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TIM CHALLIES | Coping with Death & Seasons of Sorrow (Ep. 379)

November 1, 2022 1h 19m Full transcript available
TIM CHALLIES | Coping with Death & Seasons of Sorrow (Ep. 379)
0:00 / 1h 19m
In this episode, Kyle Thompson sits down with theologian and author Tim Challies to discuss his journey through grief after the sudden loss of his son. They explore the complexities of faith, sorrow, and the hope of heaven, emphasizing the importance of enduring through life's trials while maintaining a firm grasp on God's character.
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0:55 when you subscribe at prolonlife.com/now. This is Undaunted Life, a man's podcast. I'm
1:20 your host Kyle Thompson. Let's get into it. Hi guys, Steve. Got a special guest on the podcast.
1:24 His name is Tim Chally. He is a theologian, pastor, author, and blogger. He was a very,
1:29 very early adopter of the blog format. We talk about that a little bit in the show.
1:32 In his blog, chalis.com focuses on theology, social, and cultural commentary and also book reviews.
1:38 He has written a lot of books. He's done a lot of things. His latest book that he released,
1:43 is this book right here called Seasons of Sorrow. The subtitle is The Pain of Loss
1:48 and the Comfort of God. Whenever I was made aware of Tim, I was made aware of him by some of the
1:55 people here that do some stuff here with Undaunted Life. I was like, "Oh, I want to look into him."
1:58 Then I was reached out to by his publisher. This book, it's a brutal book because it's about
2:04 what he went through in the first year after his son, his 20-year-old son, suddenly passed away.
2:10 This happened in November of 2020. He immediately starts writing because he's a writer.
2:15 And this book follows the first year of mourning, the questions he had for himself, the doubts,
2:22 the tears, the faith, the development. We get into all of that in this interview because in the
2:28 interview, I obviously talk about how he got his start as a writer and a pastor and those things.
2:33 We talk about another book of his called The Visual Theology Guide to the Bible. This guy has
2:36 a tremendous reverence for the Bible and where he gets that. What are his thoughts around Christians
2:40 that don't actually read the Bible? Because I know there's a lot of those out there I've had
2:43 certainly parts of my life where I basically haven't read the Bible at all because I've been so busy
2:47 doing other things and making all kinds of other excuses. But then when we get into seasons of sorrow,
2:52 we talk about what it was like whenever he first got the news and then how can he be confident
2:56 that he's going to see his son someday in heaven because there's obviously some debate about that
3:01 regardless of the circles that we're in. What he did to honor his son whenever he and his wife
3:05 decided they didn't want to actually view the body after he had passed away. The inner dialogue
3:10 of mourners and the things that they go through feeling like, you know, a kid's death is their
3:14 fault even if they weren't even there because he was in Canada at the time and his son was in
3:17 Kentucky whenever this death happened. Then we dig into, you know, the power of God's sovereignty
3:21 and how this almost like this entire circumstance really changed him and changed how he viewed God
3:27 and how he viewed God's sovereignty and those things. And then we talk about some other things
3:30 within the book. We also talk about reformed theology and Calvinism a little bit. So that's
3:34 gonna be some red meat for some of you guys out there. We don't get too far into that, but we do
3:37 get into it. We talk about men's ministry. We talk about what it means to be a godly man.
3:41 And I really liked his answer and I thought I was very unique. So really, really interesting
3:44 interview guys. This is not one to skip, especially if you've had any type of hurt in your life or
3:48 if you've lost somebody, this gives you a little bit of a scaffolding with which to build upon if
3:53 you're going to, you know, become better for it in Canada, maybe even turn that into your own
3:57 ministry. And before we get to the interview with Tim, I do want to remind you guys about a
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5:54 room and the king's council, Riley meek. So guys, again, I really enjoyed my time with Tim chalice
5:58 today. So without further ado, let's get into it. Tim chalice, welcome to adulthood life of man's
6:03 podcast. Hey, thanks for having me. I'm happy to have you today. There's an interesting thing
6:08 about you's you've got a lot of words that someone can use to describe who you are and what you do.
6:12 So as a wave introduction, you are a theologian, a pastor, an author, and a blogger. And I'm sure
6:19 there's some other things in there that you would add to a resume sheet or something like that. So
6:22 I guess now's the time let's correct the record. If I got any of those things wrong,
6:26 let's add some stuff. If I miss some stuff, and I guess explain to me, how did you come to what
6:30 you're doing today, you know, being able to do all those different things? Sure. Yeah. RCs for
6:36 all would say we're all theologians. So I'm a theologian in that sense, not in the sense of having
6:40 formal theological training. I think the others are true. I came to what I'm doing. So I'm a writer
6:46 and an author, a blogger and an author is what I do. And I came to that by being one of the early
6:51 adopters of that medium known as blogging way back when I jumped on it early, just out of interest.
6:57 I love to write and had some things I wanted to think about. And the way I think about things
7:02 is to write about them. And so I got in early, started writing about stuff. Other people started
7:07 reading what I was writing about stuff. And it grew up from there. Okay, very good. Now,
7:11 one of the things as well, the what I gather is that you're also a reformed person or reformed
7:16 theologian or reformed Christian or something like that. So I think some people will claim that mantra
7:22 without claiming all the dictates that potentially go with it. I know that there is a, I mean,
7:27 there's been a fight going on in my comment section on Instagram for the last week as of the
7:31 recording of this podcast, one person on the Calvin side of things, reform side of things,
7:34 one person on the not the not side of things. And they're just going to town as if either one
7:38 of them is going to change their mind. I'm just getting my popcorn watching this nonsense go back
7:41 and forth. So for you, I guess give us just so people can kind of have an idea definitionally,
7:46 what is a reformed person? And I guess what, how does that apply to you? What do you believe? I
7:50 guess if we can catch it that way? Sure. Yeah, so reformed and non reformed people should be able
7:57 to affirm one another as Christians, people who love the Lord, who have so much in common,
8:02 but just some things that distinguish us and at the same time, we all admit none of us have
8:08 everything right. So surely some of us are wrong in every way. So I hope we approach these differences
8:12 with humility rather than with fighting and all the rest. There's enough fighting in the world,
8:18 enough fighting in the Christian world that we should be battling at over this stuff. But instead
8:22 showing a lot of tolerance, a lot of love, the reformed faith would be distinguished with a
8:26 reformed understanding of Protestant Christianity would be distinguished by what they call the
8:31 doctrines of grace, the five points of Calvinism. And essentially it's just an understanding of God
8:37 that begins with this sovereignty that God has sovereign over all things, ultimately sovereign
8:42 over election, therefore sovereign over salvation. So it's God himself who chooses who will be saved
8:48 and who will not be saved. And we're on the non reformed side, you would want to ground that
8:53 in human free will on the reformed side, you would tend to ground that in God's own sovereignty.
8:59 The call of the gospel goes out to all men. It's a genuine call. All men should turn to God and
9:04 repentance and faith be saved with their sins. And yet only those who God has specifically called or
9:10 gained from eternity past only day will then decide to heed that call and come to faith.
9:15 So one thing it's interesting that you you said from the very beginning and I echo this sentiment
9:21 that we need to come to these conversations with humility, not be so disputations in the ways that
9:26 we basically can port ourselves. But I got to be honest, the people that argue the most are the
9:31 reformed guys with their peers and their cigars and they just they can't even let a small
9:36 difference in opinion on a single Greek word that doesn't even matter to the story go. And if you
9:42 don't believe every way that they believe, it's not possible for you to be a Christian because
9:46 I love listening to John MacArthur. But then there are sometimes when I listen to John MacArthur,
9:49 I'm like, good Lord, I don't know if I'm a Christian. Is my fruit sweet enough? Do I believe all the
9:53 right things? I just listened to an hour and a half long sermon where he basically said every
9:57 single Catholic on the planet is going to hell. And I'm just like, Oh man, like it's just hard
10:02 for me to go there. So I guess you're you're a much more calm or measured guy. That's how you
10:07 at least present yourself. But talk to me a little bit about that because surely you've noticed.
10:11 Sure. Yeah, I think there is some relationship between people who like to have a good fight and
10:19 people who hold to the Reformed faith. I don't think there's anything in the Reformed faith that
10:22 necessarily call. I mean, there's nothing that calls you to fight. But I think there's a sense in which
10:28 you're a minority in the Christian world and therefore maybe have your back against the wall a
10:33 little bit. And the doctrine, I mean, the theology that Reformed people hold to should be theology
10:41 that forces you to be humble because it's saying there's nothing in you that would incline you to
10:47 turn toward God. So if there's any good in you, any, any reason you turn to God and repentance and
10:52 faith, that's entirely a work of God. So that should be something that brings you on your face in
10:57 humility before the Lord. Unfortunately, it does cause some people to to fight it out. And again,
11:03 I think that's because they sometimes feel backed into the corner. Now, I'd want to distinguish,
11:07 you mentioned Roman Catholics there, I would want to distinguish Roman Catholicism from Protestantism
11:12 in the sense that we as Reformed and non-Reformed people agree on some of the fundamentals of the
11:19 gospel that Roman Catholics would not agree upon. And so Protestantism arose at the time of the
11:27 Reformation as a response to the errors of the Catholic Church, errors that have not been changed.
11:33 And so we can say we're brothers to people who are who don't hold to the Reformed faith,
11:38 make consider themselves Arminian or something. But we would not necessarily say that to Roman
11:44 Catholics because their doctrine is very different. They anatomatize much of what we believe. In other
11:50 words, they say to believe in what Protestants believe, especially Reformed Protestants believe,
11:55 is to be anathema, to be, that's a doctrine of hell. And so I think we've got to be careful
12:01 with who we who with the way we relate to those two different groups.
12:04 I appreciate you going into that. And on my notes here, I literally have a little box where I say,
12:08 go down the calvinus rabbit hole if you dare. But if as I look at the rest of my my interview and
12:14 all the questions I want to ask you, if we have some time at the end, I want to come back there,
12:17 but I want to put a pin in that for now because I think there's some other areas that I think
12:20 would be potentially more important because something that's very clear about your blogging
12:25 and your writing and anytime that you speak is you don't just read the Bible, you don't just like
12:30 the Bible. You seemingly have a very tremendous amount of reverence for the Bible and you've actually
12:36 provided a resource that I just read and finished here in the last week. It's this a visual theology
12:39 guide to the Bible. I mean, it's literally what it sounds like. It is a visual theology. This is
12:44 like a an infographic, but in book form about the Bible and my goodness, my respect for how we
12:50 got the Bible for the things inside of it. There were things that I thought I understood
12:53 having been a Christian since I was a teenager that didn't really make sense until I read this book.
12:57 I thought it was a fantastic, fantastic read, but for you, let's talk about Christians that
13:03 don't read the Bible because part of my contention, and I would love if you would disagree with this
13:07 or go your own way with it, I think we don't read the Bible because it's so easy to read the Bible
13:13 because we can have a stack of them in our office. We can have several apps on our phones and just
13:18 never have to actually read them and dig into it. But then the other side, Tim, and then I'll let you
13:22 get in here is I feel like people think they can't just read the Bible. They have to study it.
13:27 And as a guy that's very, very busy with young kids, it's like, okay, I have time to read something,
13:32 but I couldn't study that something. And so I think some people think if they're just reading
13:36 the regular words of the Bible without commentaries, without cross-referencing, that they're not actually
13:41 doing the right thing. So just talk to me a little bit about just how I guess how you got this appetite
13:45 for the scriptures, but then how we treat the scriptures in modernity.
13:48 Yeah, I would say a Christian who doesn't read his Bible is like a husband who doesn't communicate
13:55 with his wife. You're putting yourself on a path that you ought to be concerned about. It's not to say
14:01 you're not a husband. It's just to say if you continue on that trajectory, you're going to have
14:05 trouble in your marriage because marriage is fostered by communication and a marriage without
14:11 communication is really no marriage at all. And so a Christian who's not reading the Bible is a
14:16 Christian who's not relating to the Lord. He's not listening to God speak and probably then not
14:22 speaking to God in prayer. And so there's not much of a relationship there and that should
14:27 concern anyone. As you read the Bible, you see how desperately we need the Bible. You see people
14:34 talking about it as food, as life, as something that sustains us and builds us up. And we need the
14:42 word. We need to be in the word. We need to be reading it. We need to be meditating upon it. We
14:47 need to be basing our lives on it. The fundamental question we should be asking in any situation is
14:52 what does the Bible say about this? That whenever we come across any situation, whether it's times
14:58 of great joy, times of great suffering, times of great questioning, what does the Bible say? And if
15:03 the Bible says something, why am I not already doing it? And so now I'm not trying to keep guilt
15:08 on people and there are times where life is busy and perhaps we don't have a lot of attention to
15:13 give it. And as you said, I think sometimes we make reading the Bible more than it needs to be.
15:17 We don't need to be studying it as pastors studying it day by day. There's times to go deep,
15:23 but there's also times just to go wide, so to speak, or just to get the Bible in you. And so like
15:30 Donald Whitney, the theologian, talks about Bible intake as a core Christian discipline. And so in
15:37 what ways are you taking in the Bible? God can only conform you to the degree that you get that
15:41 Bible into you. You can only be conformed to the scripture, to the degree you encounter the scriptures.
15:46 And so how are you reading it? How are you getting it into your life? These are key questions we
15:50 need to be asking. Well, if you don't mind me asking you, I'm always curious because I've got
15:55 a group of guys that we kind of do some Bible study stuff together. And there's some stuff we
15:59 have coming up here soon that will relate to that. And everybody does it differently. And I love
16:04 hearing how they do it. Because some people exclusively listen to the Bible. One of my favorite things
16:08 that I own is I own a copy of all these CDs of Johnny Cash reading the New Testament. I just love
16:15 hearing him reading the scriptures through his voice. And I'll listen to James Earl Jones read the
16:18 Bible. But then I'll read it for myself and I'll do different things. But when you're reading the
16:22 Bible for study, like when you're studying the Bible, how do you do it? How do you like to do it?
16:26 What's your style? Right. So I'll say day by day, I go out for a walk in the morning and I listen to
16:33 the Bible. So I take it in that way as my part of the course, standard spiritual discipline, I listen
16:40 and then I pray. And I listen to the whole Bible once a year, sort of just follow a plan. And that's
16:46 been working for me for years. When I study the Bible, if I'm preaching or teaching, what I tend
16:51 to do is I tend to copy and paste it in the version I prefer into a Word document. And then I just
16:59 print that off. So I take out all the verse markings as much as the paragraph stuff makes sense to take
17:04 out. And I just start with a blank sheet with nothing but the Word on it. And then I try and
17:10 study that very closely. So get rid of all the notes, all the commentaries, just spend time in the
17:14 Word. And what I'm really looking for is structure. I'm looking for words that are repeated. I'm looking
17:20 for metaphors. I'm just trying to understand it without relying on other people. That builds my
17:25 skill. But it also means I'm not relying on other people. There's time for that later to go to the
17:31 commentaries to go to the study Bible. But I like just to be alone with that printed piece of paper
17:36 with the Word of God on it and starting there. And so one thing that you talk about in a visual
17:41 theology, you know, you obviously don't get into how you study the Bible. So I appreciate you getting
17:45 into that. You just casually mentioned that in the future, there's going to be a potential for
17:50 something called like neural downloads. And people have kind of heard of this if you're
17:53 following the stuff Elon Musk does or whatever. But essentially, it's the implantation of information
17:57 directly into the brains and into the memories of people. And I guess you talk a little bit
18:01 about that. You have another book here. I just have a stack of your books in here called The Next
18:04 Story. And this really gets into, you know, the digital explosion and what our lives could potentially
18:08 look like, you know, talk to me a little bit, because again, you just mention it because you
18:12 weren't really digging in too far into that into that book. But gosh, that can seem a little bit
18:16 dangerous. And are you getting the implantation of the full Bible as we would see it in whatever
18:22 version that we prefer? Are you also implanting someone's commentary, which is not actually the
18:26 Word of God? I mean, talk to me a little bit about that because I've heard that all before.
18:30 Now it would be cool if I could take a pill and all of a sudden be able to speak Spanish.
18:33 That would be awesome. But I'm a little bit concerned about, you know, maybe we're getting
18:37 these pills from the Chinese Communist Party, and they're putting stuff in our brains that help us,
18:41 you know, not be able to see the gospel. Take me through that.
18:43 Yeah. So we're just looking forward. And I wrote the book with Josh Byers. He did the
18:50 illustrations. We're looking forward a little bit and suggesting just some of the things that
18:54 might be coming in real. The point in all that is to consider what does it mean to even know
19:00 something? And so if you go back in time, the Bible for many of the people who first encountered
19:06 it, it wasn't written, it was transmitted orally to them. So they never read the Bible. Not only
19:11 that, they would consider it less than if you read the Bible. They would say to know something,
19:16 you need to memorize it, you need to get it deep into your mind. And that's when you can say you
19:21 know something. But now we have the Bible printed or we have it on our devices. That's a whole
19:26 different way of having the Bible and therefore of knowing the Bible. We can know about the Bible,
19:32 or we can content ourselves to know where to find something in the Bible. But that's different from
19:37 truly knowing it and almost that sense of having intimate knowledge of it. And so as time goes on,
19:44 what does it mean to have the Bible implanted? If that's a thing, and certainly there's people
19:48 working on this, and it may be in the future that you can have the whole Bible available
19:54 at your recall because it's been somehow planted in you. But would that be knowing it? Would your
20:00 life, would you be a better Christian? Would you be living in a way that brings more glory to God
20:05 because you had a chip implanted in you or something? I think not. So that just calls us to understand
20:11 what it means to really know something and then to really, what is God calling us to do as He calls
20:16 us to know the word? I think beyond that as well, you can quote a lot as Shakespeare and not live by
20:22 the dictates of the tragedy of Julius Caesar. I mean, it's kind of one of those things like you
20:26 can know it, you can quote it, but it's whether or not you've actually accepted it and live your
20:29 life by it. That changes. One quick thing before we get to your new book is one thing that is brought
20:34 up constantly, and it's really been popularized, if you can say that, by a guy like Joe Rogan who
20:39 has, you know, take your five best friends and my five best friends and all the people we listen to
20:43 and combine them all is still not even a quarter of what Joe Rogan gets to one episode. The guy
20:47 has the biggest microphone on the planet and he is so ignorant about the transmission of the
20:52 scriptural texts to where we have ourselves in modernity. He is convinced an entire swath of the
20:58 population of the globe that the Bible that we have today is nothing like how it was written down in
21:03 the original language because he probably, you know, saw some YouTube video 15 years ago and that's
21:07 just his paradigm. But you know, even if you're not a Joe Rogan fan, there are a lot of people that
21:11 have no idea, Tim, how we have the Bible that we have today. And they will say things casually,
21:17 like, yeah, this thing's been translated so many different times. And it passed through so many
21:21 different people's hands. We don't even have the originals. So gosh, you know, do we really know
21:25 that Jesus walked on water and not in water? It's like, we can't actually know. I know today is not
21:30 like a deep apologetics dive into how we got the scriptures for today. But if you could, could you
21:34 give us maybe a spark notes version, just a 30,000 foot overview of the accuracy of the transmission
21:40 of the text and how we got them here today? Yeah, that's not my area of expertise. And I'd
21:44 encourage you to get someone on the show who could really talk about that. Because it's a fascinating
21:48 study as you talk about textual criticism, how we did get the Bible and how we can consider it
21:54 reliable. And what Joe Rogan is saying, a lot of people think this is original or this is new and
21:59 they've backed Christians into a corner. This has been going on forever. There's no new arguments.
22:04 Christians have had to wrestle with this forever. But there is the science of textual criticism
22:09 that is able to look at the vast amounts of fragments of scripture that exist and through them to be
22:15 able to work backward toward the original text with great, great confidence. And so with where we're
22:21 at today, there's very, very few pieces remaining that are at all disputed. And the ones that are
22:28 disputed really don't have any bearing on the fundamentals of the Christian faith. So we can
22:32 have great confidence that because the Bible was copied so much so often in so many places and so
22:40 many contexts, we can gather all that we can have great confidence that we have reconstructed it. So
22:45 it's not a gotcha argument to say that we don't have the originals. No Christian believes we have
22:49 the original. Nobody's claimed that for hundreds, thousands of years. And that's absolutely fine
22:56 because we still know what they say. Absolutely. So I appreciate you getting into all that detail
23:01 and now it's probably appropriate for us to transition into your new book. So guys, if you're
23:04 listening to this on time, this book is out. It is called seasons of sorrow. And so you've written
23:09 a lot of different books. This is the only book that you've written that is like this that is in
23:12 this vein. And so from your own mouth from your own words, what is this book about?
23:16 This book is about a year of my life, a year that began with the very sudden and unexpected
23:24 death, my son. And that ended precisely one year later on the first anniversary of his death.
23:30 And in November of 2020, my son Nick, he was a seminary student at the Southern Baptist Theological
23:36 Seminary. He was doing well in life. He had just gotten engaged, was looking forward to getting married
23:40 in just a few months. And just very suddenly, very unexpectedly, his heart stopped for reasons
23:46 that we've not been able to surmise. Doctors have not been able to pin any cause on it,
23:52 but his heart stopped. He collapsed and he was gone. And that obviously came as a great shock,
23:58 a great sorrow. And that very night, as we began to head down south, we live in Canada,
24:04 he lives in, he lived in Louisville, Kentucky. So we we hopped on a plane, we started making our
24:09 way down. And I started to write and eventually became a book. And so the first words of the entire
24:16 book or this November for 2020, in all the years I've been writing, I have never had to type the
24:20 words more difficult, more devastating than these. Yesterday, the Lord called my son to himself,
24:25 my dear son, my sweet son, my kind son, my godly son, my only son. And I mean, I just got to be
24:32 honest with you, Tim, as I've as I read through the book, you know, I just usually lay here in the
24:37 floor of my studio and read the books. And I've got a two year old son and a seven month old son.
24:41 And I'm just at different points reading this book. I can't even like see the words on the page
24:46 because I'm crying. And I'm just like, man, this sucks. And I'm just, I'm sad for you. I'm sad for
24:52 me just reading this. And you know, I obviously put myself into those crazy situations. I guess
24:58 that leads me to be like, what is the feedback that you're getting from this book? Because we're
25:01 gonna dig into a lot of the things from the book here in a second. We're still kind of keeping it,
25:04 you know, 30,000 foot view. But is that the feedback that you're getting a lot of people are maybe
25:09 putting themselves in your shoes? Maybe that's helping them change some of the things in their
25:13 lifestyle to make sure they can spend as much more time with their kids and their family as they as
25:17 they would. What's the feedback them like? Yeah, so it's been five, six weeks from the time we're
25:22 recording now, working back to on the book release. So there's not been a tremendous amount of feedback
25:27 yet. Because not as many people have read it yet as will eventually be the case. But so far,
25:32 the feedback has been really positive and really encouraging. And I do think what I've done in the
25:37 book is allow people in. And so it's a real time, very heartfelt journey through a year of grief.
25:44 And grieving is a universal experience. None of us go through life unscathed. None of us
25:50 get away without grieving somebody, losing somebody. And so I think the universality of it is what
25:56 people can latch on to so they can see themselves in there. They can see their own children in there.
26:01 And in that way, I think it's encouraging to some and helpful to some. But I do think there's some
26:05 who just can't can't deal with it. Some of them probably just had to put it down because it is too
26:10 painful because of the way they put themselves in in that picture. And you know, it's important to
26:16 say God gives us grace to endure our trials. But that happens when we endure the trials. So the more
26:22 we sort of picture ourselves in something and feel all the emotions of it, that can be helpful to some,
26:27 but for others, it just overwhelms them. Yeah, and obviously we're gonna spend a whole lot more
26:31 time talking about the book. But I'll just as a quick aside and quick commercial guys, this book
26:34 is in the show notes. I wouldn't let that scare you that you're gonna potentially feel some emotions
26:39 when you're reading this. I would find it very difficult to read through a book like this and
26:42 not feel those emotions. But I would urge all of you guys to lean into those emotions. Because we all
26:47 tend to lean into the emotions that can potentially do us harm. Whereas this one, I think, could push
26:51 us towards some some major life changes. There's another quote that's early in the book that I think
26:55 brings up something interesting. And it's this, and so I know in my heart of hearts that I have said
26:59 goodbye for now, and that I've said farewell for farewell for a while, that Nick has not been sent
27:04 away, but merely sent on ahead to that place where death is no more, where mourning pain and
27:09 sorrow are gone, where God has already wiped away every tear, and where my son is now waiting
27:13 safely and patiently for his father to join him. So obviously that's that's a an ode to what we see
27:18 in Revelation, where we can all look forward to a day like that. This is where you get a lot of
27:23 consternation and debate from Christians about the confidence that we will even see our loved ones
27:29 in heaven, because there are two whole different disparate views on that. Like, no, you know, you're
27:33 not gonna have time, you're gonna be worshiping God too much to even have your friends and family
27:37 there. Other people like, no, clearly it says that we're gonna see them. I've thought about like,
27:40 if I die in a car accident, my wife gets remarried, and you know, they they're married for 60 years,
27:45 and then everybody dies. Like, you know, it's the same thing as like, is she my wife in heaven?
27:49 Is it his wife in heaven? Like, is it gonna be awkward hanging out? Is being a throuple in heaven?
27:54 So talk to me a little bit about your confidence there, because you do seem pretty confident
27:57 that that wasn't the last time you saw your son whenever you told him by the last time he flew to
28:01 Louisville. Right, my confidence is not in what I believe about heaven. My confidence is not in my
28:09 understanding what the Bible says about heaven. My confidence is in God and in the character of
28:14 God. And God makes it clear that he is good, that fundamentally he is good, which means he can do
28:19 no evil, he can wish no evil, he can want no evil, and he'll certainly bring me no evil. God loves
28:24 me. He's a father. He's inclined to me. And so my confidence is fixed there. As I look forward to
28:30 whatever is to come, life beyond the grave, I know that it will be good. I also know that we like
28:37 Jesus will have a new body. The Bible makes that clear as well. We will truly live on the far side
28:44 of the grave. We need to distinguish between this intermediate state, we call it, what Nick is
28:48 experiencing right now, and what he and I will experience after Christ returns, after this world
28:54 is wrapped up, and then we get to the new heavens and the new earth. We should distinguish between
29:02 those things. And it's in the new heavens and new earth that we'll receive these new bodies,
29:07 and we will the heavens and earth will be, depending how you see it, reconstructed, renewed, refreshed,
29:13 and we'll live upon them. And so as we think about heaven, it's wrong to think about this permanent
29:19 existence sitting on clouds and playing harps and simply worshiping in the sense of raising our
29:26 hands and listening to music. We'll be working. God made us to work. He made us to live upon his
29:33 earth that he had made. This was the right dwelling place for us. We'll be on earth and we'll be
29:38 carrying out the kind of work that God gives us to do. So I think heaven will be more earthly
29:43 than we sometimes think, but it will be without any sin, without any sorrow, without any jealousy,
29:49 even without any marriage. And so whatever you and your wife's next husband experience in that time,
29:57 it will be without jealousy. It will be without envy. It will be without marriage, without sex,
30:02 without all those things that are associated with life here. God makes it clear that whatever is
30:07 to come will be different in that way. Some of these things are temporary for this earth,
30:12 whatever we experience there will be good, no matter and perfect, no matter what we experienced here.
30:17 Well, the funny thing is, you know, when I find myself thinking about heaven, I try to just like
30:20 stop it because it's like, dude, this I have no idea. Like, so me imagining it, but every time I
30:25 imagine I imagine as I would imagine a dream state, because you're when you're having dreams, it may
30:29 seem real, but it's still like your entire world is buffering a little bit. You can't really feel
30:33 things. You can't really run as fast as you would run real life and those types of things. So I try
30:37 to leave the ethereal to the ethereal. Now, there was one part of the book that was especially difficult
30:42 to read, and I'm sure it had to be especially difficult to write and then also just to do,
30:47 but you wrote a letter to your son that was going to be placed in his sweater pocket of the garment
30:53 that he would be buried in, right? And I believe if I remember correctly, y'all decided that you
30:58 did not want to see your son after he had passed away. You wanted to kind of leave your memory for
31:03 the last time you saw him when he was alive. So in that, you included the words of an old
31:08 hymn. I won't read the whole thing here, but the end of the old hymn says, good night till then,
31:12 good night, good night, good night till then. And then you kind of, you know, write your own little
31:16 note to your son and then kind of put it in there. Just just walk me through that, because I know
31:21 there's a lot of pain. I've gotten the emails and the DM's from people in my audience that have had
31:26 to kind of deal with that. I've been to a funeral for a baby that lived for one hour.
31:30 Like it's, there's some rough, tough stuff out there, but this is how you chose to get your words
31:36 out to your son and to honor him without actually seeing him and putting it in his pocket, you know,
31:42 as it were on his actual chest. So kind of walk me through that whole situation.
31:46 Yeah. Contextually, if you, if you wind back to November 3rd, 2020,
31:56 well, there's a big election going on in America that day. My mind was elsewhere, of course, but it
32:01 was the relatively early days of the pandemic. And all that came with it, vaccines hadn't been
32:08 yet invented. People were still a little bit nervous. Some of the certainty that's come with time was
32:12 still very uncertain then. And one of the realities in Canada is once we came back from the United
32:18 States, we were locked in our house for two weeks. Nobody locked us in. We were told we had to stay
32:22 in our house for two weeks and not leave. Nobody could come onto the property, etc. So we were very,
32:27 very isolated. And it was in that stretch of time we had to make a lot of decisions. And one of the
32:33 decisions we had to make was whether we would, as soon as we were released, go out and see next
32:39 remains that have been sent back from America to Canada. And we chose not to, as you said, but
32:46 we knew that he was going to be placed in his coffin and that would be his final resting place.
32:51 And so it just felt right to me to send something other than clothes. We had to choose clothes that
32:56 we would send for him. And so yeah, as you said, I wrote a little letter to him and that took some
33:05 words that I had written to him in a letter months prior and rehearsed those, but then found that
33:11 him that him started playing in my mind. And for those who are listening, look it up. It's called
33:16 "The Long Good Night" by Matthew Smith. It's an old to him, but he adapted it. So "The Long Good
33:20 Night" by Matthew Smith, a beautiful him. And it's written from the perspective of somebody who is
33:26 dying speaking to his loved ones that are remaining behind. I just thought it was appropriate to
33:31 capture those words that include that lying good night, good night till then. And it's been a great
33:38 comfort that the thought that the Bible speaks often of death being sleep. Because when we
33:45 die in Christ, we die as Christians, it's a temporary state, not a permanent state. We fall asleep
33:51 knowing we will awake. We die, knowing we will arise. So that brings up some interesting things
33:57 just about what your mind state was at that time, but then also the internal dialogue that you,
34:02 as a mourner, as a father, have. And so you kind of speak to that here in another quote in the book
34:07 and it's this, "Could it be that Nick's death as God's discipline toward me? Could it be that Nick
34:12 who was some kind of an idol in my life and to lose my grip on him, God took him away? Could
34:17 this all be my fault? I'm haunted by these thoughts and questions." So obviously, as you're writing
34:23 this in the book, that's part of your own kind of journal entries as you're going through this
34:27 first year of mourning. But I'm curious for you, you know, being that it's, you know, almost a couple
34:31 years down the road, do you still struggle with that? Because there are mourners that feel that way,
34:37 that, you know, obviously, if you're physically responsible for someone's death, that's different.
34:41 But when somebody is disjointed from you and not near you and they pass away,
34:44 I know parents that are like, "Oh my gosh, I should have fed them different food growing up,"
34:47 because in this, you know, they wouldn't have gotten this cancer or they make up all these other
34:51 different scenarios. Just kind of take me through where you're at, I guess, when you wrote that,
34:55 and then how you progress to where you are today. At that time, so after the funeral,
35:02 my wife and my two daughters and I, we flew out west in Canada to the Rocky Mountains. We just
35:09 needed to get away and we needed to be in nature. And, you know, God speaks to us through His word,
35:15 but God also speaks through creation, and we just needed to be there. We felt a deep need,
35:22 and so we flew out there, and it was at that time that these questions were really going through my
35:27 mind, really trying to work that through. Could it have been something I did? And, you know,
35:32 I've read a lot of the Puritans, those writers from the 1600s, and, you know, they would speak
35:37 often about these sorts of things. What the Bible says, God chastises the ones you love,
35:41 just as you, as a father, sometimes have to discipline your kids in order to correct their
35:45 behavior. The Bible makes it clear that sometimes God has to discipline us to correct our behavior.
35:50 If we won't just read the Bible and do what it says, sometimes God has to intervene in some ways.
35:55 And so I was, for a time, really haunted by the thought that maybe I had done something,
36:00 and this was God's way of rebuking me for it, but it was out in nature. I was in the Rocky Mountains,
36:07 and again, this is where the pandemic worked well. I had the Banff National Park pretty much to myself.
36:14 There was almost nobody there. I could go to some of the prime spots and be by myself,
36:18 and so I got up early in the morning, drive out there, and just stand in the mountains,
36:24 and it was there that I came to realize that, no, I've been putting myself in the center of the
36:29 universe, as if something I did, God would take out on my son. It doesn't sound like something God
36:35 would do, so I had to think about the character of God again, and then I had to think about myself.
36:40 So when you stand before a mountain, it's hard to think great thoughts about yourself, I find.
36:46 When you look up at the night sky, it's hard to think that you're the most significant creature in
36:50 the universe. You realize that this world doesn't revolve around you, and I think that was the
36:54 understanding I had to come to, that I'm at the center of the universe. I'm at the center of
36:58 Nick's universe, and so whatever transpired between God and Nick was between them, and isn't it more
37:04 likely God took Nick out of love than out of spite or out of punishment? Who knows what? I don't know
37:11 God's reasons. I can speculate a little bit. We don't know God's reasons. He doesn't owe us answers,
37:15 but we can trust his character and just believe that he's good.
37:18 Well, and Tim, you used the phrase there, the character of God, and so, you know, this was the
37:24 part of the book that I highlighted, starred, like, okay, make sure you asked him about this.
37:27 So I'm going to read this quote here. "Perhaps the reality is that I fear God in a new way,
37:31 and that some kind of innocence has been shattered. Before Nick's death, I understood that God had
37:36 power, but now I know that he has power. Before, I understood that God would exercise his power in
37:41 giving what I love, but now I understand that God will also exercise his power in taking what I love.
37:47 Before, life was easy because God's sovereignty always seemed inclined toward the things that I
37:52 wanted, but now life is hard because I see that God's sovereignty may also be inclined towards
37:57 the things I dread, the things I would never wish for." And so, Tim, when I read that section,
38:02 I immediately thought of another book by a pastor named Matty Montgomery out of Tennessee. It's a
38:06 book called Scary God, and it's about, you know, literally learning about the fear of the Lord and
38:10 how, you know, the fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge and wisdom and those types of attitudes.
38:16 But some people might read that paragraph, Tim, and get really, really scared, or just be like,
38:22 well, that's not the loving God I know. I mean, we talk about the Lion of Judah a lot on this show
38:26 because, you know, the Lamb of God is really, really easy to grasp, and you want to just hug
38:30 the Lamb of God and snuggle with them. The Lion of Judah kind of scares us a little bit,
38:34 but I just want you to, I don't want to even set it up any more than that. Tell me about your feelings
38:39 when you wrote that, because that for me was one of the most powerful things to try to put myself
38:44 in the, I guess, the shoes of a morning father and to have those thoughts. So please give us a little
38:49 more on that. When we were going through this time, we had to anchor ourselves to something.
38:58 Something had to be true. So our world had been utterly rocked. It's like you're going through
39:02 an earthquake and the ground is bouncing and everything around you is turbulent. You know,
39:07 I'm in the basement here. I would grab ahold of that metal pole and I would hold on to that
39:11 because that's something that's going to stay fixed. And I think in much the same way, we needed,
39:18 in our time of trauma to reach out and grab hold of something that we knew was true. Whatever else
39:24 was going on in the world, this was true. And what we latched on to was the character of God
39:29 displayed specifically through His goodness and through His sovereignty. And so we just said,
39:34 we know that God is good. Whatever else is true in this world, whatever else is true of our circumstances,
39:39 God is good. And God is sovereign. There's nothing that happens in this world that God doesn't know
39:45 about. Nothing that in some way hasn't passed through God's hands. Even the evil things that
39:50 happen in this world, in some way God ordains or permits, depending how you want, what language
39:55 you want to use. But Satan doesn't ever get the final victory here in terms of he doesn't sneak
40:01 around God. He doesn't hold on over on God. God didn't fail to notice some condition
40:07 in Nick's heart. None of that is true. So we anchored ourselves to God's goodness
40:11 and sovereignty. And the question was, we were so glad to accept these things when they were
40:16 inclined to what we wanted anyway. Oh, look at the sovereign God. He granted me a lovely son or
40:22 look at the sovereignty of God. He granted me a wife that I love so much. Well, God takes away.
40:27 Are we still going to say this God is good and this God is sovereign and we're bowing the knee
40:32 to Him? That's always a question. Will we believe the same things are true about God and our sorrows
40:37 that we do in our joys? And I think what you're you're talking about there is trying to link
40:43 ourselves to something that's more tangible than a feeling because we kind of have this
40:47 feelings focus in just modern society, but certainly in modern Christianity. And I think that ties
40:51 to another quote from the book here. I realize I have been trusting too much in my feelings and
40:55 I must submit them to facts to truth into what is imminently more trustworthy. My feelings rotate
41:01 like the earth. My emotions come and go like the seasons. But the truth is as fixed as and constant
41:06 as the sun. When I focus on what is true, I understand that God is present with me.
41:11 So with that, Tim, obviously, I think, you know, men and men's ministries, they get a bad rap
41:16 because they're like, they want men to not engage in their feelings. And you know, if you're going to
41:19 be a modern man, you need to be a feelings driven man. But it's like, feelings are fine, but we
41:24 shouldn't be driven by them. I think that stoicism has kind of been demonized in modern culture,
41:30 even though stoicism in and of itself can be an incredibly valuable tool, especially, you know,
41:35 as, you know, someone like a thinker like George Peterson would say, is be the man at your father's
41:39 funeral that everybody else can attach themselves to and depend on for strength. Like, just putting
41:44 yourself in that mindset changes how you feel about feelings, not just completely disregard them
41:49 forever. But it's like, in this moment, nobody needs extra feelings. We need something that we
41:54 can rely on. Is that kind of where you feel like you you've gotten to or maybe am I putting too much
41:59 on that? Maybe a little too much. I think what I would say is that we need to subject our feelings
42:05 to truth. And what we tend to do is the opposite. So we go through this tremendously difficult time.
42:11 We're feeling all the feels. And what we do then is reinterpret our theology on the basis of our
42:16 feelings. I feel miserable. Therefore, I need to believe that this is true of God. I feel this is
42:23 God has wronged me in some way. So now I'm going to overturn what I believed about God based on what
42:28 I'm feeling far better. And I think what God calls us to do is to say, I'm going to I will feel grief.
42:36 I will feel sorrow, but I still need to even anchor my feelings to what is true. And so I can
42:44 grieve but not despair in my in my loss because I know that God is good. I know that God is sovereign.
42:51 I know that Nick loved the Lord. There's no reason for despair in that sense. And so, you know,
42:57 I think stoicism has some attraction to men these days. And I'm, you know, I understand where that's
43:02 coming from as a pushback, but to just threads that are going on in society. And without getting
43:09 too deep into it, Christians are not stoics. There might be some common truths or something,
43:15 but we should feel our feelings. And you know, when Jesus lost his good friend Lazarus,
43:20 he stood before the tomb and he wept and he was unashamed and unashamed in his weeping before the
43:26 tomb of his friend. And that was a, here's a perfect man living a perfect life and really
43:30 just pouring out his heart and tears. And we should do the same. But what he didn't do was
43:35 revoke his, his understanding of God or change his theology on the basis of his feelings.
43:40 I appreciate your, your opinion on that and some of your thoughts on that. One thing about that
43:46 was interesting as I was reading through the book, Tim, is you could just feel almost this
43:50 disputacious attitude in your, in your soul where you wanted something and then you didn't want it.
43:55 You wanted to leave something there, but you also wanted to pick it up. And one of the times in the
44:00 book is when you were kind of thinking about the afterlife, which it wouldn't make any sense to a
44:04 non-Christian is like, why wouldn't a Christian be thinking about the afterlife all the time? It's
44:08 supposed to be awesome. It's supposed to be just the land of milk and honey and golden roads the
44:11 entire time, right? But let me read this quote here and then we'll back into a question. But I can't
44:15 deny that I have often looked forward to that day and feared that day with equal measure. I've
44:20 wanted to be with Christ, but I've been low to be away from all that is here. I've long to be faced
44:25 to face with him, but I've been afraid to leave the familiarity of this world for the uncertainty
44:29 of the next. I've sometimes referred earth to heaven, sight to faith here to there. Tim, I've
44:35 been exactly in that place to where it's like, when Christians seem really, really scared to die,
44:40 you know, they get the, the cancer diagnosis or when they get into a big accident and you know,
44:44 they realize that the time is limited, they seem terrified. Part of that might be because they
44:49 don't know for sure if their name is written in the lambs book of life, maybe, maybe they've been
44:54 listening to John MacArthur too much, you know, sorry, John MacArthur, but like, maybe there's just
44:57 something there where they're just like, is it crisis of faith or maybe it's just, they're sad
45:02 because they're leaving their family behind or maybe there's projects that are going to be left
45:05 undone and they know they're never going to get done. But talk to me a little bit about like what
45:09 that's like with you because I think everyone in our audience to a certain degree feels this.
45:13 This life can be pretty good. And I think we need to just be honest with that, that we experience
45:19 many joys and many pleasures. Those of us who have, I think, an honest self-assessment should
45:24 realize we don't deserve those things. We can sometimes feel very entitled to them. But honestly,
45:30 we don't deserve all the goodness and all the graces we experience in this life. But we get
45:36 them and we appreciate them and we come to expect them. And it's well and good to really enjoy
45:42 life's pleasures. You read the book of Ecclesiastes. Just read into chapter 11 and you'll see,
45:47 here's these, enjoy this. Enjoy these pleasures. That's a right thing to do. It honors God when we
45:53 just enjoy a good cup of coffee or when we look long and deep into the eyes of the one we love.
45:59 These are good things. Enjoy our children. But what we can't do is fail to long for
46:06 the end of all sin, the end of all evil, the end of all pain, sorrow, suffering. And we can get
46:12 really attached to the things of this earth and then fail to really long for heaven and long for
46:18 the promises to be fulfilled. And I think that's because we often don't trust that things really
46:21 will be so much better there. That the pleasures we experience in this life are actually just
46:26 pointing us forward to greater pleasures. And so the joy and the intimacy of marriage is absolutely
46:34 wonderful. But even that points to something big or something better, something that's going to
46:38 bring us more joy and more pleasure. And what I found through my loss was that it really did
46:46 help me see this world is broken and this world has many sorrows. And just one example of a sorrow,
46:53 I'll look forward to letting go of. The only way I'll ever let go of the sorrow is to die. It's the
46:57 only way. I'm never going to stop being sad. I'm never going to stop missing Nick. I'm never
47:01 going to stop longing to see him again. But that will come only when I die. And so over time, I think
47:07 God pulls our hands off these things. You know, we prize our fingers off this world so that we can
47:14 really look forward to the world to come and to his presence and to all that he's got stored up
47:19 for us. I think that's that's a great word and a great point on that because when you think about
47:23 the pleasures in this world, they're the big ones that all of us can kind of think about and
47:27 everybody has that for themselves. But I remember a Matt Chandler sermon way, way back years and years
47:32 ago before he was canceled. But it was basically like taste buds. How awesome is it that God gave
47:38 us taste buds where we can taste the food and the texture of food and the temperature of a food
47:43 and that to like lead to a little bit of happiness inside of our soul, even just for that one minute.
47:49 And how much more and how much greater is there for us on the other side of this world when taste
47:55 buds are the small thing that can give people a tremendous amount of pleasure. And the other
48:01 thing that I think is important as you talk about in your book is you talked about endurance.
48:05 And the way, well, I'll read this quote and guys, if you're talking to me reading quotes,
48:09 I got a couple left, just follow me here. But here's another quote from the book.
48:12 And if in the early days, we needed strength to keep our heads above water, you're talking
48:16 about your family here, strength to simply keep us from drowning in sorrow, we now needed endurance,
48:22 the fortitude to carry a heavy burden through a long journey. So from the beginning of undaunted
48:28 life, Tim, we've talked about the difference between strength and resilience, or I guess you
48:32 could call it endurance. So strength is something that we're all attracted to. We like the strong
48:36 man competitions. And it's like, Oh, where are you spiritually strong or weak? And that's the
48:40 paradigm we think of it is. But I always think about resilience. What is your ability to bounce
48:44 back? Because even if you're really, really, really strong on one day, well, time over time,
48:50 you're you're going to get weaker regardless of what you're talking about, unless you work on that
48:54 and you work on that ability to bounce back. And you kind of are giving a commercial there for
49:00 endurance or resilience, because strength is going to leave you at some point. There's going to be
49:04 that day when, you know, the meal train has stopped, no one's coming by just to see how you're doing,
49:09 and it's just you. And if you're depending on strength in that moment, you may be found wanting.
49:15 So talk to me a little bit about when you realize strength is what you had, but what you need now
49:20 is resilience or endurance. It's enduring the first few days, the strength you need to use
49:28 your paradigm here to get through the first few days is one thing. But there's, as you said,
49:33 there's such support networks early on. And even then there's there's more going on. Your mind is
49:37 really dulled. You don't feel things normally your, your heart, your soul, your mind, your body,
49:43 everything is just taken over by your grief. But over time, things begin to write themselves.
49:49 You sort of discover this new normal. But what you realize is you've endured two months. Now,
49:57 you've got another 45 years of this thing to go. And, you know, you got through the early trauma,
50:03 but now you've got this long path to walk carrying a sorrow. And that sorrow, as we said before,
50:07 we'll never go away. I'm never not going to be sad. That's just impossible. Never forget Nick.
50:11 I'll never stop loving him. And that means I've got, let's say, you know, with the Lord's God,
50:15 for me, let's say another 40 years of carrying that. That's a different kind of strength they'll
50:20 need to to endure that over the long haul. And yeah, so I think that's what I was pointing to in the
50:26 book and using the metaphor of carrying watering cans to Nick's grave. You know, it's one thing to
50:30 lift up those watering cans from the point where I put the water in them, but it's quite a long
50:35 walk to his grave. And so carrying those over a long period of time is a different kind of thing.
50:40 And often leaves you very, very tired. And what I want to, what I want to push myself to do then,
50:47 or what I'm really concerned for, is I would be able to endure this and that I would not lose
50:52 heart. I would not lose faith. I would not continue to rely on God. I would not, I would can, I just
50:57 want to rely on his grace all the way to the end and not give up the fight before that.
51:03 Well, I appreciate that word. I want to end with one quote from the book, and then we'll put a
51:06 wrap on seasons of sorrow. And it was just because I feel like it really summarizes the book. And
51:10 guys, we're barely scratching the surface on the book. So if some of this stuff is speaking to you,
51:14 there's a whole lot more here. I'm just going into the stuff that I keyed into. But let me read
51:18 this quote here. I must allow his death to make me godlier, to make me holier, and then to love
51:23 and serve all the more. And then quite a bit later in the book, there's another quote.
51:27 I'm convinced this is a ministry God has called me to the ministry of sorrow, a ministry of faithful
51:34 suffering. And so Tim, there are people in this planet that when something befalls them,
51:38 when they lose a loved one, as is what we're talking about today, it changes their life. And then they
51:44 become a naval gazer for the rest of their life. They always see the internal side of the sorrow
51:48 that they're feeling. And they don't try to see how that is supposed to direct them outward. But you
51:54 literally describe describe this as a ministry of sorrow. So you're coming out of seasons of sorrow,
51:58 because your book is broken down into, you know, fall, winter, spring, summer, right?
52:02 But now you have a ministry of sorrow, which Tim, you could have done without having lost your son.
52:08 You know enough about the Bible. You know enough about the goodness and of God and his ability to
52:14 provide for his children. But now you are uniquely qualified to speak to somebody that has experienced
52:20 something in the same way that you have. I know if you had your brothers, you might rather do
52:25 something else than that you might have him called you to being like, you know, race car driver
52:30 ministry or something cooler than that. But like, take me through that to where you feel like, no,
52:35 this isn't just something that happened to me and my family. This is now my new ministry.
52:39 Okay, so first I want to say ministry when I'm using that word, I'm primarily thinking in the
52:45 local context. And so what God calls us to, I hope he calls us to first in the local setting. So
52:52 I'm not the least bit interested in a speaker who's out there on the circuit preaching great
52:57 sermons, but isn't part of a local church. He's off. We're grounded in the local church. That's
53:03 the most important thing we'll ever do is care for our family, care for our local church, care for
53:07 the people right around us. So what we believe is if God is truly sovereign, then he's shaping his
53:14 people in a way that serves his purpose. And one of the ways he does that is by calling people to
53:19 different ministries. He puts people in the church who can preach, people in the church who can
53:24 sing, people in the church who can serve in all sorts of different ways. And for some people,
53:29 he fits them for service by taking something, by making them pass through this time of grief.
53:34 And so because God has done that, I think he's now called me, called my wife, called my family,
53:42 to he's enabled us to reach out to other people who are going through a sorrowful time.
53:48 As you said, it's not to say I couldn't do it before, but now I've got something,
53:55 I've got experience to draw upon, which makes me more credible, but also just gives me knowledge
54:00 that I can bring to bear. I know now more of what's effective and not effective. So I don't want to
54:06 say if you've not suffered deeply or useless or anything like that, not at all. You still got the
54:10 word. You still got the spirit. You can still reach out to people and bring them comfort. But I do
54:15 think there's people, God, he quips in special ways just by having them pass through something.
54:19 And I tell you, there was something about having people who had lost a child come alongside of us
54:24 and love and care for us. That was just such a tremendous blessing and tremendous comfort,
54:29 because they could say things like, you can do this. And we felt that same thing. And that's
54:34 normal. And that was just such such a comfort. I want to say something to your audience. Before we
54:40 went on air here, you talked about who your audience is, primarily men. And so I want to say
54:45 something that I think is an important message to men, which is if you go through a time of deep
54:52 sorrow, deep trauma, there will be that sense you talked about to just drop out, to become a navel
54:57 gazer and to just drop out of the race. But I think what you'll find and what you need to ponder
55:04 is that when you're most broken is also when you're most needed. So you go through a time like this,
55:10 you don't get to opt out of being a husband. You don't get to opt out of being a dad and then
55:14 functioning like one. Your family is going to be in desperate need of your leadership
55:19 right at that time that your heart is absolutely shattered. And so in that moment, you need to
55:24 look to God for strength and you need to man up and you need to just lead your family right
55:29 through the valley of the shadow of death. I think that's so, so important. The worst thing you could
55:35 do is just become useless to your family in that moment when they most need you when it's when our
55:40 countries go to war that we want our leaders to be leaders, you know, it's when we need them to
55:44 lead the most. And it's when your family goes through trauma, that right there is when you need to
55:49 prove your leadership tops and you need to lead your family to the best of your ability and trusting
55:54 that God will equip you to do so. That's absolutely a great word. And one thing that I would add to
55:59 that is sometimes something will befall you that you could not have prepared yourself for similar
56:05 to I mean, you were looking forward to this long and illustrious life that your son was going to
56:09 have with this new wife and and all those different things. This wasn't even on your radar. But for
56:13 a lot of guys, it's putting in those daily deposits, right? Because I don't care what your hobbies are
56:18 because again, a lot of these men's ministry groups, it's like, okay, you have to camp, you have to
56:20 hunt, you have to eat beef jerky, you have to have a beard. And it's like, no, those things are
56:24 those things are fun. Those are awesome. But those things don't make you a man. I care if you're
56:27 developing and cultivating spiritual mental and physical resilience on a daily basis. Because
56:33 let's say you're you're in really good shape and you're like, hey, I feel like God wants me to be
56:36 in really good shape. I don't I don't know why, but I'm going to keep putting in the miles or keep
56:40 putting in the way, you know, picking the weight up and putting it back down. And then one day God
56:44 calls you to something that requires your body to work really, really, really well. And right now,
56:50 not 90 days from now when you have a chance to train, not two years from now after you've gotten a
56:53 bunch of professional coaching, he needs you now. So that's an example that most of my audience can
56:57 understand, because most of my guys are Jim rats. But I think that's absolutely right. Guys, the
57:02 things that you're doing in your life right now, put the time into the word, put the time into your
57:06 worship into your prayer life, put your time into your community, into your family, so that you're
57:10 creating those deposits, you're making those deposits every day, because one of these days,
57:15 you may have to go to the bank and take some of it out. And if you don't have a lot in there,
57:18 you're going to be in trouble. And so before we let you out of here, there's a couple of other
57:22 things that I did want to bring up. But I really do appreciate you letting us get so far into seasons
57:26 of sorrow. Because as I told you all fair, I know that this sucks, because I wish you and I didn't
57:30 know each other, right? But we know each other because of this book, right? And so that's just
57:35 what we're going to do now. We're going to try to bless as many people as possible through this
57:38 conversation and push them to that. So again, guys, seasons of sorrow, it is in the show notes,
57:42 but something that you brought up a little bit and you obviously just addressed the men here on the
57:45 show. I want to talk a little bit about men's ministry, but maybe even broaden that out to just
57:50 overall godly masculinity. Because again, as I've said, there's the cultural caricatures of
57:56 masculinity, you know, Chase's women dips and, you know, place football and all those different
58:00 things. And that's fine. And then even in the church, a lot of these men's ministries,
58:03 you wouldn't believe some of the books I get sent that are they're trying to just redo John Eldridge's
58:08 wild at heart, but they're not nearly as smart, not nearly as poetic. They're just trying to rewrite
58:12 it in their voice. And I feel like a lot of men's ministries now are missing the mark entirely,
58:18 because they're not basing this masculinity in, in what we see from Jesus in the Bible.
58:24 When you go up and just ask random men, not in church, you know, who are the manliness men from
58:28 history, they're going to tell you, you know, Teddy Roosevelt or Jack London or John Wayne,
58:33 or they're going to give you those kind of culturally masculine guys, they're never going to think
58:37 Jesus of Nazareth. Part of me thinks that's because of this unbelievable emphasis on the lamb of God
58:43 and the complete ignoring of the line of Judah, men go to church and they feel like they're singing
58:48 these Jesus is my boyfriend songs and they don't really get how this guy could possibly clear the
58:53 temple because he seems like such a, you know, soft and soft smoking guy that would never really make
58:58 anybody mad. But talk to me a little bit about godly biblical masculinity because I feel like
59:03 we're losing that and I'm trying my best to yank people back on the other side.
59:08 I think what you said about culture is important because our view of masculinity is shaped by our
59:14 culture and the more you travel, the more it messes with what you believe is masculine. So you can go
59:19 to some countries where the men hold hands with one another as they walk around and that's normal
59:24 and good and doesn't have any sexual overtones. But I would imagine if you and I were in the same
59:29 place and they took your hand just to walk around a conference center or something that wouldn't be
59:33 deemed particularly masculine would probably weird you out a little bit. So we need to understand
59:38 these things are culturally bound. What struck me as you were talking is that the Bible calls
59:44 men as elders and pastors. It says nothing about how heavy a load they can lift. It says nothing
59:52 about how fast or far they can run. It describes only character or character and one other thing
59:58 which is the desire to do it, the ability to teach. But other than that it just describes character.
1:00:04 So in the Bible describes a man who would be an elder, a man who would be a pastor. It's talking
1:00:08 about his character. He's a one woman man. He is committed to the word. He is faithful. He is all
1:00:16 these different things. There's this long list of descriptors of that man and none of them have to
1:00:22 do with either the cultural form of masculinity or cultural form. You know a woman chaser. It has
1:00:28 nothing to do with John Eldridge's form of masculinity, swinging swords or you know living on mountains
1:00:35 or whatever. It just calls us to be men of character and that's the Bible's concern.
1:00:42 The rest of what you do again is culturally bound. You should probably be masculine in ways your
1:00:46 culture says says you should be. But that's not the Bible's concern. It's concerned with our
1:00:51 character, with how we live before the Lord and how we relate to the people around us.
1:00:55 With that in mind, obviously guys don't hear what Tim's not saying. He's not saying, Hey guys,
1:01:01 if you work out, you're not honoring God by any shape or form. Like obviously God gave you a body.
1:01:04 You need to take care of your body. That includes the things you put into it. That includes your
1:01:08 output, all those different things. But I would agree with that. And I've certainly struggled with
1:01:12 that in my lifestyle because I've been an athlete my entire life. And so it's easier to go to those
1:01:16 things. It's easier for me to sprint to the end of the parking lot as opposed to digging into some
1:01:21 like obscure theologian and trying to figure out what he has for me and how it can elucidate the
1:01:25 text even further. And so I think it's a message for men out there about a well-roundedness to your
1:01:30 approach to your own godliness and understanding that the character of you and how you operate in
1:01:36 your family is way more important than how big your biceps are or how easily you could take someone
1:01:41 down while I think those things are awesome. And I think those things are fun and it's good to
1:01:44 kind of dedicate yourselves to some of those things to better yourself to increase your resilience and
1:01:49 all of that. To bring it back to the whole Reformed and Calvinist thing and we don't have enough time
1:01:54 to really really dig here. But when I've been in discussions here recently, Tim, with people of
1:01:59 all stripes, so people that would consider themselves to be Calvinist, some that would consider themselves
1:02:03 to be Armenian, some that have no idea what either of those things are, but they believe this one thing.
1:02:08 There's this consternation and I've expressed it earlier in this conversation about how do I
1:02:13 know that I'm saved? Because if you listen to a Reformed guy, if you raised your hand at church
1:02:18 camp, you're probably going to hell because that wasn't it. You didn't do it, right? Or, you know,
1:02:22 if you were sprinkled as opposed to dipped in fully immersed and everyone's got their own story of
1:02:28 salvation, but even as some people are describing it, there's that hint of doubt that, oh man,
1:02:34 I hope I've done it right. I hope I've listened to the right pastors, the right theologians. I
1:02:37 hope I've read the right version of the Bible because obviously you can't get anything from the
1:02:41 message. It's got to be English standard version. It's got to be NASB or whatever. But I guess from
1:02:46 your perspective, give a message to the people in my audience and me included where you're like,
1:02:50 you're thinking about, am I saved? Like, am I going to be with Jesus someday? Because if I'm not,
1:02:56 how can I leave my voice to do that? And, you know, a lot of my guys in my audience feel that way.
1:03:00 So I'm asking you, I guess, to pastor me and my audience a little bit here and kind of walk us through
1:03:04 that. Yeah, I would say what you're doing as a Christian is you're not looking to yourself,
1:03:10 you're looking to Christ. If we have any hope at all, that's hope that's fixed in Christ. We're
1:03:14 looking to Him and our hope, our confidence, our faith, our trust, however you want to determine it
1:03:20 is in Christ. And so if you're thinking about, well, I know I'm a Christian because I do this or
1:03:25 because I have done this. It's not fixed in the right place. You're looking to Christ and you're
1:03:29 saying Christ has paid for my sins. He's called me to believe in Him and I've done that. Therefore,
1:03:35 I can have great confidence that God will be true to His promise. He will save me. He has saved me.
1:03:40 He will bring me home. But we do have to examine our lives. And we do have to look and say,
1:03:44 so am I living as a Christian? Because maybe we did raise a hand at a youth camp once. But maybe
1:03:50 our lives haven't had any substantial change. So we're not living like a Christian, even though we
1:03:55 did do make a motion as a Christian. So we are called to examine our lives to see if we're truly
1:04:01 in the faith. And I think the way to do that is not just to do it internally, but to ask people
1:04:07 around you. If you're having doubts, you need to talk to men around you, trusted men, pastors,
1:04:12 elders, people who have that character and have been identified by the church as leaders in the
1:04:17 church. Talk to them and say, do you see saving faith in me? We can have other people assess us.
1:04:23 Ask your wife. She'll tell you if she sees you living as a Christian. And if what you profess
1:04:28 to be true matches who you are, she's going to have this close-up view of you. And she'll be able to
1:04:34 say whether you're a complete hypocrite or whether you're living in consistency with your
1:04:38 profession. Because at some point that profession of faith, what you say you believe and how you're
1:04:42 actually living, those two things need to align. They'll hopefully come into closer alignment
1:04:48 over the course of your life. And so just remember, we're saved by grace alone through faith alone.
1:04:54 We're not saved because of the greatness of our faith. We're saved by the existence of our faith.
1:05:02 Faith of a mustard seed. In Christ, in His atoning sacrifice, that's what it takes to save us.
1:05:09 And so if your hope is fixed on Him, you're saved. You can have great confidence. But do,
1:05:14 do then ask people, are you seeing the evidence of that in my life? You can use that phrase,
1:05:18 the evidences of grace. You see evidences of grace in my life,
1:05:21 evidences that God has saved me. And that is now sanctifying me that I'm living for His glory.
1:05:26 To further that, I super appreciate that. To further that a little bit. I know that there are people
1:05:31 that are okay, they experience God more through their intellect than they would ever at some sort
1:05:36 of a worship service or while singing a song, it's just how they're wired or who knows. But there
1:05:41 are people that would say, Tim, I have the knowledge that the only way that I am saved from eternal
1:05:48 damnation is Christ's death on the cross as a propitiation for my sin, right? He paid the debt
1:05:55 that I owed so that I could be close to the Father. You know what I mean? That type of a thing.
1:05:59 So they know that. It's an intellectual thing. It's as much for them as knowing that George
1:06:05 Washington was the first president and that they ate eggs and bacon for breakfast that morning.
1:06:09 They just know it. But maybe they wouldn't describe it as that they feel that, that they
1:06:14 believe it. They're going to describe it as they know it. Maybe I'm not making a whole lot of sense,
1:06:18 but I know that people really like splitting hairs here about what they know versus what they
1:06:23 actually believe because I would say I lean more towards the intellectual side to where it's like,
1:06:27 no, I believe that we're not just, you know, humans that used to be chimps, that used to be fish,
1:06:32 that used to be goo. Like I believe in all of that in the, you know, that the creation story and
1:06:36 everything. And Jesus dying on the cross and the resurrection, the evidence therein makes the most
1:06:41 sense out of all this. I believe that to be true intellectually. Am I making sense where people kind
1:06:46 of lean more towards the intellectual as opposed to the feel? Yeah, when God saves us, he doesn't
1:06:51 overhaul our personality. I mean, we are some of us are more intellectual. Some of us are more based
1:06:55 on feelings and God makes us different and that's okay. And so if you're an intellectual, it would
1:07:01 probably be expected that you'd have more of an intellectual relationship with your faith. If
1:07:06 you're more of a feeler, it would make sense that you would have more of a feeling relationship. That's
1:07:10 not to say the feelers have no intellect and vice versa, but you shouldn't expect that God will
1:07:15 completely overhaul who he has made you to be just because you've come to faith. And so I think
1:07:20 that those intellectually minded people are coming up with the other ones who are listening to the
1:07:24 apologetics podcast and really grounding their faith and all these evidences and they're clinging
1:07:29 to that. That's well and good. Other people have no interest in that. They just say, you know,
1:07:34 I heard the gospel. It made sense to me. I believed it and that's good enough for me. That's fine too.
1:07:38 So I don't think it's always that helpful to compare ourselves to other people to compare our
1:07:44 faith to other people's. What's helpful is to compare ourselves to Christ to examine do we really
1:07:49 love him? Are we really living for him, living for his glory? And over time, we're becoming more and
1:07:54 more conform to his image. That's, that's where we need to be looking. I appreciate that. I'll leave
1:08:00 this last question here. Those will be last question of the day because I know we're run up against time.
1:08:03 I've talked with fathers and I've talked with people that they would, for the love of God,
1:08:08 they would literally never bring this up in church. But when they kind of get out and about and then
1:08:12 you kind of get asked about this and then they'll kind of open up about that consternation about
1:08:17 whether or not children can be saved. Like the, the age of reason, the age of accountability.
1:08:22 And so I know like, I didn't grow up in any type of faith tradition. I grew up, I was born in Oklahoma.
1:08:27 So according to my parents, I was a Christian because I was born on the red clay of this great
1:08:30 state, right? There was no gospel in our, in our lives, the Bible was in our house, but it had an
1:08:34 inch of dust on top of it. But when people see a five year old raise their hand and say, yeah,
1:08:39 I'm accepting Christ and they get baptized and all that, I got to be honest, I'm a little bit
1:08:43 pessimistic about that, a little bit cynical about that. I'm like, but are they though? Like,
1:08:47 they can barely make it through the day without crapping themselves. Like what, what do they mean?
1:08:51 They're, they're accepting Christ. And I know this kind of back into the whole reformed Calvinist
1:08:56 theology. But I, I'm just asking you a lot of questions because you seem adept to be able to
1:09:00 answer them. Because I know people in my audience struggle with that, they struggle with that with
1:09:04 their own children, but also with, you know, the children that are part of their children's peer
1:09:08 group. And they want to be able to celebrate with these people with these families. But if they,
1:09:13 in their true heart of hearts, they're like, man, I just don't know.
1:09:15 I would distinguish between what a child can do. I think any child can put their faith in Lord
1:09:22 Jesus. Again, we're told to have faith like children. God commends that. And it doesn't take
1:09:28 great faith. It just takes faith. The existence of faith is plenty. But there's a difference between
1:09:33 a child being able to, and the church publicly affirming it. So I would say a five year old can
1:09:39 absolutely be a Christian. And we can, we can commend that. We can teach that. We should be
1:09:43 calling to the children off and put your faith in Jesus. And that's good. But I would hesitate to
1:09:48 baptize a five year old as, as the church's way of affirming that person's faith. I would want to
1:09:55 wait until they were a little bit older, really until they're that age where they can choose not
1:09:59 to. Five, most five year olds are going to do what their parents said. They're going to believe
1:10:03 what their parents says. So I think it's helpful to wait a little bit until they've had the opportunity
1:10:08 to rebel or until they've seen enough of the world, tasted a little bit of its pleasures,
1:10:12 and then had their faith tested in that way. So that's where absolutely, I believe, a five year old
1:10:18 very much can become a Christian. I think it's a little unusual. Most kids, I think, become Christians,
1:10:23 you know, were raised in the church probably a little bit later than that. But as a church,
1:10:27 I would want to hold off affirming that through baptism or through profession of faith over your
1:10:31 church does that until they're a little bit older, a little bit more mature, a little bit more able
1:10:35 to articulate those things. And again, to know that they face some sort of testing.
1:10:40 I lied. I have one more question, but it's a quick one. And it's related to the last thing,
1:10:43 just to follow up on that. You know, obviously, I mentioned in this podcast, I went to the funeral
1:10:48 for a baby that lived for about one hour. And you know, they're obviously like both of my sons
1:10:52 right now, they can barely talk, barely walk all those different things. I know a lot of parents
1:10:58 are worried that if their kids pass away, they don't know because I haven't had a chance to accept
1:11:02 the gospel. And I know you've dug into the scriptures. When I dig, I can't get a really solid answer on
1:11:07 this as to kind of what happens to those babies. My wife and I technically have four kids because
1:11:11 we didn't get to meet two of them because they died while they were in the womb. So what about
1:11:15 what about those souls? Because obviously, if you are pro life, you believe that from the moment of
1:11:18 conception, that that is a new unique image bearer of Christ, what could be our comfort that, you know,
1:11:25 where our kids are and where their souls are? Yeah, the Bible doesn't speak to it. I don't see the
1:11:31 Bible speaking to it with a clarity that some people do. So John MacArthur, my much admired,
1:11:37 he would his phrase is instant heaven. And he really believes that any child anywhere in the
1:11:41 world in any circumstance who dies before an age of some sort of reason instantly goes to heaven.
1:11:46 I'd like to believe that. I don't see that in the scripture. I don't know anyone who believes the
1:11:50 opposite who would just say all children who die in empathy go to health. I would line up more with
1:11:55 a group that says the Bible doesn't make it clear. So instead of saying definitively this is what
1:12:01 happens, let's just say we know that God is good. We know that God makes no mistakes. And so we can
1:12:05 have great comfort in his character. I think Christian parents especially can have tons of comfort
1:12:12 that, yeah, I think that the by far majority view of the church would be at least that
1:12:19 children who die in infancy and are children of Christian parents are in heaven and you have
1:12:25 nothing to fear, maybe a little bit more dispute about what happens to non-Christian children who
1:12:31 die, but ultimately whatever our view, whatever our level of certainty or uncertainty, God is good,
1:12:37 God makes no mistakes. We can have tremendous comfort in him.
1:12:41 Well, Tim, I think that's a great place to leave it. We've gone everywhere in this conversation.
1:12:44 I appreciate you. Let me go out through all these rabbit trails and things like that. But that's
1:12:48 all for me. Is there anything else you want to get off your chest? No, all good. Thanks for having me.
1:12:52 Tim chalice. Thank you for coming on Daunton life and man's podcast.
1:12:55 There you go, guys. Hope you enjoyed my time with Tim chalice, but before that you go,
1:12:58 we are going to do a quick resilience boost. Adam Daunton life or mission is equipping men to push
1:13:02 back darkness with content that for just spiritual mental and physical resilience. So again, just a
1:13:06 reminder text upper room to 727472 3860 to get your application or to actually schedule a one-on-one
1:13:14 with Riley meek of the upper room and the king's council. The link's I've got for you today. I've
1:13:18 got a link to Tim's blog that is chalice.com. I've also got a link to his Amazon page and to a
1:13:22 page where you can buy his new book seasons of sorrow. Guys, thanks so much for listening to
1:13:26 the show. We do appreciate it. Wherever you're listening to this, please subscribe, rate and leave
1:13:29 us a positive five star review. If you want to come speak live at your event or on your podcast,
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1:13:55 their album Leveler. The links are in the description. I'm your host Kyle Thompson. Remember, keep pushing
1:14:01 back darkness, keep forging spiritual, mental, and physical resilience. Keep seeking the lion of Judah.
1:14:31 [Music]
Key quotes
2
Tim Challies
I must allow his death to make me godlier, to make me holier, and then to love and serve all the more.
Tim Challies
I'm convinced this is a ministry God has called me to: the ministry of sorrow, a ministry of faithful suffering.
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