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085 - If

July 4, 2019 44m 31s Full transcript available
085 - If
0:00 / 44m 31s
In this episode, I tackle Rudyard Kipling's poem 'If,' breaking down its powerful messages about manhood and resilience. This isn't just poetry; it's a guide for every man striving to embody strength, humility, and perseverance in the face of life's challenges.
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0:58 This is Undaunted Life of Man's Podcast.
1:11 I'm your host Kyle Thompson.
1:13 Let's get into it.
1:14 All right, guys, today's podcast is going to be a unique one for you.
1:19 Because this is, I think I can safely say this, the first time I've ever done an entire
1:24 podcast episode about a poem.
1:28 Yeah, I know.
1:29 I know all you tough guys out there.
1:31 You just cringed when you heard the word poem because I know it's like, hey, poetry's for
1:35 wussies.
1:36 We don't really do poems.
1:37 We don't write them.
1:38 We don't read them all.
1:39 Okay.
1:40 And dude, I get it because there's a thing.
1:41 I'm just going to be honest with you from the jump.
1:42 I don't really get poetry.
1:44 I don't really understand it.
1:45 It's not really something that I'm in that familiar with, to be honest.
1:48 I've got some friends that have written some poetry.
1:51 They've got like poetry and books and different things and I just don't get it.
1:55 I read a big book, the book of man that I've suggested to you guys on this podcast before.
2:00 It's on our, it's on our book list on our website, the hundred books every modern Christian
2:03 man should read list.
2:05 And there's a ton of poems throughout there and about a third of the way through the book.
2:09 I just stopped even trying, right?
2:11 I'll just, I'll just straight up admit it to you.
2:13 Here's the guy that's always challenging you to read and push yourself and all that.
2:16 I just stopped trying because it's like, dude, I'm not getting this.
2:18 I'm not quite understanding, but I came across a poem because I was interviewed on a podcast.
2:23 It was the, thank the universe podcast.
2:26 And this guy was doing kind of a deep dive into manhood and what manliness means and masculinity
2:32 and all these different things.
2:33 So he wanted me to come on and speak about that, but he mentioned the poem if that's
2:38 I F if by Rudyard Kipling and obviously having not been a literature major, done a lot of
2:44 poetry or short stories or anything like that.
2:46 I had never heard of this guy, okay?
2:49 But even if you haven't heard of Rudyard Kipling, you've heard of some of his work.
2:52 So just to give you a little background on this guy, he was born in December of 1865
2:56 and died in January of 1936.
2:59 This was an Englishman, a journalist, writer, a poet.
3:02 His most famous book is the Jungle Book, right?
3:04 So we all know that at least from the Disney movie.
3:06 But he was seen by many kind of at his time in history as an innovator in the world of
3:12 short stories.
3:13 Okay, so short stories apparently hasn't always been a thing.
3:16 This guy is one of the main innovators of that whole movement.
3:20 The guy even won the Nobel Prize in literature in 1907 and he won that at the age of 41.
3:26 You don't really see a lot of folks that are that young winning that award, but the unique
3:29 thing about when he won and he was actually the first English language writer to receive
3:34 that award and he was the youngest writer at that time up to that point to receive that
3:39 award, which is, which is pretty incredible.
3:42 But if the poem is considered by many to be his most famous, if not his greatest poem written
3:49 in his entire career.
3:51 And so the thing about this poem, again, for whatever reason, there's some things that
3:55 when I read it, I can really jive with it and I can really get into it.
3:59 But other times I feel like I need to listen to it to actually kind of get the sense of
4:02 what it's all about.
4:04 So I read this poem and I feel like I got it a little bit.
4:07 But then for whatever reason I plugged in if Redyard Kipling into YouTube and I found
4:12 a really interesting recording or it was a video rather of Dennis Hopper reading it.
4:18 Okay.
4:19 So if you're not familiar with Dennis Hopper, I'm sure you would recognize his face.
4:22 He's been in a lot of things on television and movies.
4:24 I think, I don't know, he had a bunch of villain roles back in the nineties.
4:28 I think it was the bad guy in the movie speed, something like that.
4:31 But this was actually a recording of him reciting this poem on the Johnny Cash show.
4:37 So the Johnny Cash show was like 1969, 1970, 1971.
4:42 It was kind of a short-lived show.
4:43 But I mean, Johnny Cash was kind of the host of this variety show and things like that.
4:48 And so it was really interesting.
4:49 The audio on it isn't the greatest because again, this is late 60s, early 70s audio.
4:55 But I just wanted to let you hear somebody else read it.
4:57 I was thinking about reading it myself, but I didn't know if I could really do the poem
5:01 justice.
5:02 But what I want to do is I want to let Dennis Hopper read this for you guys and I'll include
5:06 the link later.
5:07 So if you want to watch it visually, you can certainly do that.
5:09 And then we're going to break down the poem, you know, basically line by line.
5:13 And again, I know for some of you guys are like, okay, this is going to be one of Kyle's
5:16 podcasts that I skip.
5:18 Just hang with me.
5:19 All right.
5:20 There's a lot in this very short poem.
5:21 There is a lot to talk about.
5:23 So let's go into Dennis Hopper's reading of that here, his recitation rather.
5:27 And then we'll be back here just a second after he's done with that.
5:32 And it's called if, if is a middleware guy, a special spot for you, Dennis Hopper ladies
5:36 and middle.
5:37 Thank you.
5:38 If you can keep your head, when all about you losing theirs and blaming it on you, if
6:00 you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, but make allowance for the doubting to,
6:09 or being lied about, don't deal in lies, or being hated.
6:18 Don't give way to hate it.
6:22 And yet, don't look too good in a talk too wise.
6:29 If you can dream, but not make dreams your master, if you can think, but not make thoughts
6:41 your aim, if you can meet with triumph and disaster, and you just treat these two impostors
6:53 just the same, or bear to hear the truth that you've spoken, twisted by names to make a
7:02 trap for fools, or watch the things that you've given your life to broken, and stoop, and
7:15 build them up again with worn out tools.
7:17 If you can make one heap of all your winnings, and risk it, and one turn of pitch and toss,
7:28 and lose, and start again at your beginnings, and repeat the word about your loss, if you
7:38 can force your heart, and your nerve, and your sin you, to serve your turn long after
7:46 they are gone, and so hold on when there's nothing in you, except the will, which says
7:54 to them, hold on.
7:57 If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue, or walk with kings that never lose
8:08 the common touch, if neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you, if all men count with
8:16 you, but none too much, if you can fill the unforgiving minute with sixty seconds worth
8:27 of distant run, yours is the earth, and everything that's in it, which is more, you're going
8:38 to be a man, my son.
9:05 So I do think that is a good reading there, I think it was dramatic, and I'm sure back
9:09 in the 60s and 70s that seemed really awesome, and it's just cool, anytime you get to hear
9:12 Johnny Cash's voice on anything, he has one of those voices that just are super unique,
9:17 and I'm literally sitting here in my studio, and I've got a Johnny Cash action figure looking
9:20 back at me.
9:21 I couldn't exactly tell what he said there at the end, if you go back to the last five
9:25 seconds of the clip, Johnny Cash is telling Dennis Hopper, "Hey, I'm going to remember
9:30 that, I'm going to sing it with June Carter," I couldn't really pull out what he said,
9:35 but they shared a little moment there if you watched the video.
9:38 But the thing is, obviously, this entire poem builds up to that last sentence, and in that
9:45 last sentence, he kind of actually botched it, there's a few times in this recitation
9:49 where he gets the words a little bit wrong, but you still get the gist of it.
9:53 But the last sentence is, "And which is more, you'll be a man, my son."
9:59 So you're reading through this entire thing, and again, the poem is called If, and there
10:03 are 13 If statements that are made here, and so what we're going to do is we're actually
10:07 going to break down each one of those statements because I think there's some good nuggets
10:11 to pull out for us, but especially for you guys that are raising young men, right?
10:15 So whether they're newborn or 30 years old, whatever the thing is, you're still technically
10:20 raising them, you're still father to these guys, and I think there's some interesting
10:24 nuggets for you guys out there that have sons.
10:26 So let's go ahead and do the first if statement here at the very top, and that's if you can
10:30 keep your head when all about you are losing theirs and blaming it on you.
10:36 So the thing about this is you look at certain situations, and I'm kind of reminded of things
10:41 from books like extreme ownership or the dichotomy of leadership, or really any of these military
10:46 books.
10:47 I just mentioned the two that were written by Jocko Willink in Lake Babin, but in a lot
10:50 of these situations, the guys who are most successful in war are the ones that can keep
10:55 their wits about them, right?
10:57 And especially in a lot of these other situations, I even recall my stepdad talking about when
11:02 he was in the army, he was in these tank divisions.
11:04 And it was the guys at basic training that were screaming and pounding their chests the
11:08 most, right?
11:09 Man, I just can't wait to get over there and kill me some terrorists and blah, blah, blah,
11:13 and those types of guys that as soon as the bullets started whizzing past their heads,
11:18 those are the guys that were, you know, basically [inaudible] themselves in the bottom of the tank,
11:21 right?
11:22 It's one of those situations where you have to be calm so that you can be definitive.
11:28 And so that's the thing is in a lot of these situations when these people are in frantic
11:33 type situations, it's hard for them to understand why you're not frantic as well.
11:38 And so the second part of that is are losing theirs and blaming it on you, right?
11:42 That may be one of those situations where they're freaking out.
11:44 They don't understand why you're not freaking out, but a good virtue, a good thing for men
11:49 to strive for, especially young men is can you control yourself?
11:52 I even know for me, like as a young kid and even into young adulthood, I really did struggle
11:57 with self control and it was mainly with anger, right?
12:00 I just, I couldn't keep my anger under control and it was one of those things that I've had
12:04 to really work towards kind of getting a governor put on top of that.
12:08 So that's an important statement right there.
12:10 The second if statement is this, if you can trust yourself when all men doubt you, but
12:15 make allowance for their doubting to.
12:19 So when I think of whenever I hear this statement is you've got to have self confidence.
12:23 I mean, that's, that's pretty, that's pretty duh from that first statement, right?
12:27 Is trust yourself when all men doubt you.
12:30 But the thing is, is when someone doubts you, you do need to investigate where their doubt
12:34 is coming from.
12:36 Now once you do that investigation, you might think to yourself, okay, they're just jealous.
12:40 So you investigate it, you get to the bottom of it and you, they're just jealous.
12:44 They want you to slow down so that you don't make them look as bad, right?
12:49 And they think if you succeed, it's just going to continuously make them further and further
12:52 away from you and other people's eyes.
12:55 But in the other cases, some people are going to doubt you and their doubts are merited.
13:00 These are people that have watched you not be able to control yourself.
13:04 And so when you need to be in a situation where self control is paramount, they're going
13:09 to doubt that you can make that happen.
13:11 If you continuously underperformed and now we have another project, a big project that's
13:16 in front of the team and you've continued to underperform, you should look at their
13:20 doubt and take it seriously.
13:21 Think about it in a team context.
13:23 If every time that you've had runners on base, you've struck out, like you kind of freak
13:27 out because you see that runner sitting out there on second, you're all you want to do
13:29 is bring them home and then you just, you know, clam up and you strike out.
13:33 The team shouldn't be terribly confident the next time that there's a runner on second.
13:36 You know what I mean?
13:38 And so for you to understand that and have the self awareness to where you can actually
13:41 dig into that and think through that, that helps you prepare.
13:44 And I know you some, some examples that I think most of you guys will recognize, but
13:48 I'm sure even as I described that, you thought of other examples as well.
13:52 So the third if statement is this, if you can wait and not be tired by waiting or being
13:58 lied about, don't deal in lies or being hated.
14:03 Don't give way to hating and yet don't look too good nor talk too wise.
14:09 So the first part of that is again, is if you can wait and not be tired of waiting.
14:12 That's just patience.
14:14 And I mean, guys out there, raise your hands.
14:16 If you're one of the guys that struggles with patience, right?
14:19 It's just, I can't stand it.
14:21 That's why you can angry behind the wheels because you're selfish because you think you're
14:23 the only guy on the road, but also you got somewhere to be, you got somewhere to be man.
14:28 But again, just another reminder that we need to be patient.
14:30 I don't think I need to beat that dead horse.
14:32 The next line of that is or being lied about, don't deal in lies.
14:37 So it was funny, I was listening to a podcast today, it was Grand Allen's podcast, where
14:41 he was on with a representative, Dan Crenshaw.
14:44 So if you don't know who Dan Crenshaw is, he's a former Navy SEAL Harvard graduate.
14:48 And now he is a state representative or sorry, it's a house of representatives representative
14:52 for Texas.
14:53 He lost his eye in war, so he's always, you know, walking around with an eye patch and
14:57 all that.
14:58 It's pretty dope.
14:59 He's a lot of people are wanting him to run for president in 2024, you know, those types
15:02 of things.
15:03 But this is a guy that was talking about, you know, they kind of asked him, you know,
15:07 him and his wife were being interviewed and it's like, what's the hardest part?
15:09 What's the hardest part about being in public life being in the political sector?
15:12 And they were just like, man, it's when people lie about you, when people purposely mislead
15:17 the public about things that you've said or things on your record, and you spend so much
15:20 time and energy and focus just trying to correct the record.
15:23 But the thing about it is is some people fight lies with lies.
15:27 I mean, especially in the political sphere.
15:29 So someone, you know, print something or says something that is in direct contradiction
15:33 to something that you've said before, and you could just make up a lie right back because
15:36 here's the thing in most of the media knows this.
15:39 That's why they do it this way.
15:40 They'll get you with the lead of the story and the title of the story.
15:44 Even if in that story, three or four or 10 paragraphs down, they basically go against
15:50 what was said in the lead.
15:52 They know most people don't read past the lead, right?
15:56 They know most people don't even go past that.
15:59 So they're operating in lies and they're thinking about things in terms of lies.
16:03 But again, it's okay if you're being lied about, don't deal in lies.
16:06 And the next side or being hated, don't give way to hating.
16:09 It's kind of the same thing.
16:11 Some of us have experienced real hatred.
16:14 And this could be from busted relationships.
16:16 It could be from people being racist.
16:18 It could be from people being judgmental.
16:19 It could be from people, you know, evaluating their religion as being above yours.
16:23 Some of us have actually looked at situations and can surmise it.
16:27 Yes, this is hate going on right now.
16:29 But the thing about it is is being hateful only begets more hate.
16:34 So you do what you can to go, you know, basically go to the other side of that continuum.
16:38 And the last little line here was, and yet don't look too good nor talk too wise.
16:42 I think that's obviously talking about being humble, having humility.
16:47 And for you guys out there that are very alpha and very talented, this is going to be difficult
16:52 for you, right?
16:54 And so if you have some of those characteristics, you're competitive, you're alpha.
16:58 You're an achiever, you're a maximizer.
17:00 Sometimes you're going to walk around with your head a little bit too high and your chest
17:03 puffed out a little bit too much.
17:06 And I mean, I got to watch that.
17:07 I know a lot of guys in my life that have to watch that.
17:09 But again, it's just another reminder that humility wins out.
17:12 The next if statement, this is the fourth one is this.
17:15 If you can dream and not make dreams, you're master.
17:20 So I think the obvious thing here, and I think there's a corollary here for the Christians
17:23 that are listening is a lot of us have dreams and we have aspirations.
17:28 Those things can become idols because if dreams become your master, then nothing that
17:34 you have at this exact moment is going to be good enough.
17:38 So you think about guys that, you know, they just moved into a new house and they're already
17:43 kind of looking around and they see stuff on, you know, Facebook or on Zillow about a friend
17:47 that moved into a better house and a better neighborhood, right?
17:49 With a bigger pool or whatever the thing might be.
17:52 And all of a sudden you were excited a day ago, now you're not excited anymore.
17:56 And so your dream has shifted this, this idol of having things and having people look at
18:01 what you have and being impressed by it is all of a sudden your master because the point
18:07 here is not to, you know, not have dreams.
18:09 We should obviously have dreams and aspirations, but you should also pass that through the filter
18:13 of, is this what God wants for me?
18:16 Because if you spend all this time and effort building this lifestyle that, you know, is
18:21 surrounded around things that you have and trips that you take and people that you hang
18:25 out with, it's going to be that much harder if God says, Hey, I need you to sell everything
18:30 and move to like the middle of nowhere, Asia and spread the goodness of my name.
18:37 I mean, it's going to be difficult.
18:39 I mean, what was the parable?
18:41 It was, you know, it'd be harder for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than a rich
18:44 man to enter the kingdom of heaven.
18:46 It's one of those types of situations, right?
18:48 So we have to make sure that we can master our dreams or are probably better yet, give
18:52 the keys to God and let him master that.
18:54 Let's go to the fifth if statement here and it's this, if you can think and not make thoughts
18:59 your aim.
19:01 So I remember whenever I was hearing didn't stop or even just go through it just now,
19:05 the immediate word that came to mind was action.
19:09 Because I know so many guys that are thinkers, right?
19:12 They just think and reason and they're trying to, you know, basically traverse certain situations
19:18 and all they want to do is think about it.
19:21 But if thoughts are your aim, you're never going to get anything going.
19:26 You're never going to get actual tangible results because you're just going to be intellectualizing
19:32 and theorizing about things.
19:34 So if you can think and not make thoughts your aim, we should all be thinkers again.
19:38 You probably heard me say this a lot on this podcast.
19:40 I want us to be thinking Christians.
19:42 I want us to be thinking active type Christians, but at the same time, thoughts and thinking
19:49 alone can't be your aim.
19:50 That's why when I read some of these philosophers and it's just like, okay, what do you do for
19:54 a little bit?
19:55 I'm a philosopher.
19:56 It's like really?
19:57 So you're like a professional useless person like you don't, you just think all day is that
20:01 all you do?
20:02 It's like, bro, you're not going to come out and be one of the world's greatest philosophers.
20:05 I mean, it's just almost every good idea is already taken.
20:09 You know what I mean?
20:10 It feels like I know that's a little bit judgmental for me to say, but it's just like, at the
20:13 same time, it's it you're just thinking all day.
20:17 It's like, have you done anything?
20:19 Oh, no, I just think and then let other people read my words and let it move them to action.
20:24 It's like, okay, bro, like whatever you want to do.
20:27 But again, the encouragement here on this fifth if statement is just basically, you can't
20:31 just let thoughts be your aim.
20:32 You got to take action at some point.
20:34 So the sixth statement is this.
20:36 If you can meet with triumph and disaster and treat those two impostors just the same.
20:43 So if you're actually looking at the text of the poem, the words triumph and disaster
20:47 are capitalized, right?
20:49 So like they're proper nouns.
20:51 And I thought that this was really interesting because a lot of us spent that's kind of the
20:56 carrot and stick dichotomy.
20:58 So you have triumph, right?
20:59 You know, that's that's the carrot.
21:00 You know, you're working for the carrot and the disaster.
21:03 That's the stick, right?
21:04 I'm trying to avoid that at all costs.
21:06 And for me personally, I'm more motivated by potential disaster than I am for triumph.
21:12 Now everyone's kind of want to continue them, right?
21:14 You know, they're somewhere in between those two.
21:17 Not everyone's probably going to be completely to one side or the other.
21:19 But I definitely lean more towards the disaster side.
21:22 And so I think what this is saying is you need to be leveled out.
21:26 You need to be leveled out right there in the middle because triumph and disaster again,
21:31 it calls them imposters and you should treat them just the same.
21:35 And so if you can even out that fear and that excitement, so the fear of basically succumbing
21:41 to disaster or the excitement of reaching that point of triumph, I think it's a great
21:46 thing for us all to remember that the motivation doesn't win the day.
21:52 It's the outcome that wins the day.
21:55 So regardless of what you're motivated by, there still needs to be movement, which goes
21:59 back to the last statement that there's got to be action.
22:02 So the seventh statement is this, if you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken, twisted
22:07 by naves to make a trap for fools or watch the things you give your life to broken and
22:14 stoop and build them up with worn out tools.
22:18 So the cool thing about this, there's a lot of things in here and again, if this guy was
22:23 alive, I'd love to kind of hear why he put things this way.
22:27 But it's basically where you see your life, the things that you've created and they don't
22:32 work out for whatever reason.
22:35 So for some of you guys listening to this, maybe it's your marriage that broke down.
22:39 Maybe it's a business that you built that didn't quite work out.
22:42 Maybe it's a job that you were let go from.
22:46 Maybe it's a relationship with a family member, a sibling or even your children, something
22:50 like that.
22:52 And for whatever reason, it's broken.
22:55 Do you have the ability to build it back up and are you even going to try?
23:02 I think that's pretty important, but I like the last few words.
23:06 It's build them up with worn out tools.
23:10 So what this is assuming is that the tools that you're using are, they're used.
23:15 I mean, they've actually been used before, right?
23:18 So you've been building other things.
23:21 You may have even been trying to build up the situation that now you would consider
23:26 to be broken.
23:27 So I think it's important, then I don't know if he put a ton of meaning there with the
23:31 idea of worn out tools, but in that entire little section, the word worn out was the
23:37 one that that really made sense to me because it implies that there's been work that's
23:42 been done up to this point, not that you know, you waited until everything was broken and
23:47 then we're just going to pull these brand new shiny tools out to try and fix things.
23:51 It's like, nope, we're just going to stoop down, we're going to build back up with what
23:55 we can.
23:56 We're going to use what's here in front of us and we're going to make it happen.
23:58 So maybe I'm reading a little bit too far into that, but that's what I got out of that
24:02 section.
24:03 So let's go to the eighth if statement here.
24:05 If you can make one heap of all your winnings and risk it on one turn of pitch and toss and
24:11 lose and start again at your beginnings and never breathe a word about your loss.
24:17 Okay, so obviously I'm not advocating that you guys put it all on red seven or whatever
24:22 the thing is.
24:23 I don't know they've ever played the game, but like, you know, this isn't an all in type
24:26 deal, right?
24:27 So guys, let's just, you know, you're a real man, if you can take all your winnings and
24:30 just push it into one hand, like I don't think anybody's advocating for that, but I think
24:34 it's really key what he says that they're very in there and never and never breathe
24:38 a word about your loss.
24:40 So something that I've seen from some guys, not a whole lot of guys that I keep close
24:44 to me now, these guys just love to talk about how hard of a life that they've had.
24:49 Oh, you know, when I lost this job, oh, you know, when I got screwed over by this person,
24:54 oh, you know, when my wife left me, oh, you know, when this and when the churches didn't
24:58 see it my way and I just, whatever.
25:01 And they're just a broken record of nonsense.
25:05 It's just stuff that didn't work out and the whole time in my head when those people
25:09 are talking, I'm like, these dudes would really get some use out of reading extreme ownership
25:15 by Jocko Willink.
25:16 Because then if you ever read that book and if you haven't heard him talk about that concept,
25:19 it's about taking ownership of everything and realizing that if it's a situation where
25:25 you're involved, you have an impact on the outcome.
25:30 Even when things seem completely outside of your control, there's some bit of it, even
25:34 if it comes down to the planning that is in your control.
25:38 But the thing about it is this my encouragement to guys out there, if that's you, if you're
25:42 constantly complaining and constantly thinking about ways that life has done you wrong and
25:47 people have done you wrong, what are you gaining from that?
25:52 How has your life improved since you've been thinking that way and operating in that way?
25:58 Because there's some virtue in the guys that endure loss and endure things quietly.
26:06 Now what I'm not saying is if you're hurting, right, that if you're, if you're hurting
26:11 down to your soul, I mean, if your family is falling apart around you, that you should
26:15 just sit there and take it like a man, that's not what I'm saying.
26:18 There are certainly times when you should reach out and talk to people, dude, I don't,
26:21 what was it?
26:22 Two months ago, I have a podcast called loss where I talk about my wife and I losing two
26:26 babies in the last year.
26:27 So obviously I'm not advocating for complete silence, but at the same time, if you're just
26:33 this incessant bullhorn of negativity and all these things that have happened to you,
26:39 at what point are you helping yourself and you're certainly not helping the people around
26:43 you?
26:44 And have you noticed, if that's the type of guy you are, that you don't have a lot of
26:48 friends hanging around?
26:50 Want to hear the latest story about how life kicked you in the gonads?
26:53 I mean, have you thought about that at all?
26:56 Have you noticed that people don't really want to be around that?
26:58 And it's not just about people like, oh, I just don't really want to be around them.
27:01 He's bringing me down.
27:02 It's even deeper than that because you're making them think about all the things in their
27:06 life that haven't gone their way either.
27:09 Guess what?
27:10 A lot of us have gotten a raw deal.
27:11 We were dealt a raw hand from the beginning, but you have to play it.
27:17 That's where I get so confused by these people and to get a little bit political here, but
27:20 these people that talk about privilege and the things that one person gets above them.
27:25 It's like, well, man, would I have preferred to have been born six foot six with tremendous
27:30 athletic ability far and away above what I have now?
27:34 You darn right that there's a chance I could have turned that into millions and millions
27:38 of dollars, right?
27:40 But I wasn't dealt that I'm five foot 10, slightly above average height, right?
27:46 But that's the hand I was dealt.
27:49 Some people, you know, they talk about their race or they talk about their gender and that
27:52 everything's just an excuse to complain about how the world has just been so unfair to me.
27:57 It's like, bro, being an overcomer, like, how many great stories are written about people
28:03 that just lived up to their current circumstances?
28:06 That's something no one's making a movie about that.
28:10 No one's reading a book about somebody that just lived a normal life and, you know, every
28:14 time life knocked them down, they stayed on the mat for an extra few seconds.
28:19 It's always those stories of people that overcome.
28:22 So be thinking through that.
28:24 All right, guys.
28:25 The ninth if statement here, if you can force your heart and nerve and sinew to serve your
28:31 turn long after they are gone.
28:34 And so hold on when there is nothing in you except the will which says to them, hold on.
28:41 So will here in the last little, um, last little section is capitalized, right?
28:46 So another proper noun there.
28:48 So I think there's a few ways to take this.
28:50 Um, and I could be missing it out, missing out on it here.
28:54 But the way that I took that is it kind of even goes back to the podcast.
28:57 I did a few episodes ago called go there.
29:01 Now it's probably a little bit deeper than that, the, the go there thing was basically
29:04 talking about how dudes just give up on working out way too, way too early.
29:08 And they're just a little bit too soft.
29:10 Um, so on a micro level, I would say that this, this kind of goes on to that.
29:14 So hold on when there is nothing in you except the will, which says to them, hold on, right?
29:18 You know, just hold on to, you know, the bar just a little bit longer, you know, uh, to
29:24 put a little bit more weight on the bar, whatever the situation might be.
29:27 But I think the macro side of that could even go as far as suicide.
29:32 And I'm just kind of spitballing here.
29:34 I didn't really plan to talk about this side of it, but it's just like where you have these
29:38 suicidal ideations, uh, when life is, is really, really getting after you and you feel, uh,
29:44 this dark presence on you that, you know, a psychologist that has a humanist worldview
29:49 would just say, oh, that's just negative feelings, whereas most of us that are Christians understand
29:52 that that's, that's demons, that's demonic, uh, presence in your life.
29:56 But this is kind of making sure that you have that inner will, that resilience to just hold
30:01 on that you're in it right now.
30:04 You're in the thick of it and things don't look good and it doesn't look like you're
30:06 going to get out on the other side.
30:08 Again, I think there's a micro point to be made here in the macro point.
30:11 So for some of you, it's, it's just another example, hey, you need to go there sometimes
30:15 you need to, you know, just tell that internal week person that they need to shut up long
30:20 enough for you to get through this workout.
30:21 But then the other side is it's just for guys that are feeling like they've got nothing
30:24 left.
30:25 There's always something left.
30:26 There's still a plan for you because you're still here.
30:28 All right, guys, 10th if statement here, if you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue
30:34 or walk with Kings nor lose the common touch.
30:39 So the thing about this here that I think of because I find myself up in front of groups
30:42 talking somewhat often is it's kind of enticing and intoxicating and attractive.
30:49 When you get up in front of a group of people and you make them laugh and they're having
30:53 a good time and you teach them something and they come up to you afterwards and they're
30:57 just like, man, you did such a great job.
30:59 Thank you so much for coming about.
31:00 It makes you feel good.
31:02 I mean, I had a good buddy of mine come up to me at the gym on Sunday and he just goes,
31:06 man, you're really good at podcasts.
31:08 Like, dude, you're just, you're just awesome at it.
31:11 And I just wanted to tell you, no, hello, not.
31:12 Hey, how's it going?
31:14 He just went right into that.
31:15 He's like, dude, I need to give you a hug.
31:16 You're good at this.
31:17 And I was like, man, this is like a really smart dude, a guy that I respect a lot and
31:22 to give me that compliments, like, you know, shoot, I'll take that.
31:25 But man, that can go to your head, right?
31:28 It kind of can be hard for you to keep your virtue.
31:30 I know that there's some guys out there.
31:31 I've heard these stories about these guys that go around.
31:33 They do keynote presentations and then they end up cheating on their wives because all
31:39 that excitement of it goes to their head and then there's usually some tramp up in the
31:43 audience that's like, Hey, I'd love to wreck your home life.
31:46 How about we go back to my hotel room, right?
31:48 So it started with a, an instant enough conversation that ended up at the bar that ended up in
31:52 their bedroom, right?
31:53 That's just kind of how it goes.
31:55 But the second side of that is or walk with Kings nor lose the common touch.
31:59 I think for some of you guys out there, especially if you've done well in business, if you've
32:03 done well in life, if you were popular in school, all those different things, sometimes
32:08 you end up in rooms with people that are, that are important.
32:12 I mean, maybe there are people that are worth a lot of money.
32:14 Maybe they're politicians or athletes or something like that.
32:18 But the thing about it is is you should never lose that ability to have that common touch.
32:22 Again, it comes back to being a humble.
32:24 So if you're one of those people that is, is well to do or well known, or you are one
32:29 degree of separation from people that are like that.
32:33 You didn't like its old hat because they're not Jesus.
32:38 So they might be a pretty cool person.
32:40 They might be an interesting person, but man, they just don't even rank.
32:44 Just treat them as such.
32:46 I remember back in 2012, I had a, a fairly unique opportunity to help out Major League
32:51 Baseball up in New York with this marketing thing that they were doing called the MLB
32:54 fan cave.
32:55 And we were around literally in nine months, hundreds and hundreds of current players,
33:01 former players, Hall of Famers, celebrities, musicians, actors and actresses, models.
33:08 Like there were just people that were around all the time.
33:12 But the thing I had to constantly remind myself of is these are just people.
33:17 I mean, I remember one time when Derek Jeter walked in, it was just like, dude, you're
33:20 in the middle of New York and Derek Jeter walks in and you're sitting there just talking
33:23 to the captain towards the end of his career.
33:25 It's like, that's DJ like, man, that's the captain right there.
33:29 At the same time, it's like, he's just a regular dude.
33:32 He doesn't want to be bothered.
33:33 Like, he doesn't want people meddling in his personal life.
33:35 He wants to have fun.
33:36 He wants to enjoy himself and he wants to do well while he's on the field.
33:39 Right?
33:40 Kind of like us.
33:41 You know what I mean?
33:42 Just trying to get through life, trying to enjoy himself, trying to do well at work,
33:45 type of a thing.
33:47 So regardless of who you're around, you should be able to be the same person.
33:51 You should be the same person with, you know, the celebrity or the politician or the rich
33:54 person or whatever as you are with just your neighbor.
33:58 Just asking for help for something, right?
34:00 You should be able to continue to comport yourself in the same way.
34:02 All right, just a few statements left here.
34:05 So here's number 11.
34:06 If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you.
34:11 So again, gonna have to bust the word out again, resilience because the thing about it
34:16 is you know, guys, you've got people that don't like you and you got people that like
34:19 you a lot and they can hurt you the same.
34:23 Now there's going to be a little bit more psychological strain when someone that you
34:26 love hurts you or lets you down or backstabs you double crosses you, that type of thing.
34:32 But the thing is, is we've got to stand.
34:35 So we'll take this from, from the secular point of view and then we'll take this from
34:38 the Christian point of view.
34:39 The secular point of view is you got to be able to depend on yourself and you got to
34:42 make sure that you were impenetrable to other people's arrows, right?
34:47 Don't let anyone bother you.
34:48 My dad always used to tell me, Kyle, don't sweat the small stuff.
34:50 Now I always thought about that.
34:51 Just let it roll off your back.
34:52 Don't worry about it.
34:54 But then on the Christian side of things, these are just people that are in your life
34:58 that need Jesus too, whether they hate you and they're doing things actively to destroy
35:03 your life, whether they're loving friends of yours that will never live up to the expectations
35:08 that they have for themselves, much less the expectations that you have for them, understand
35:12 that every single one of you has fallen short of the glory of God, that you don't have anything
35:18 to add to what Jesus has already done and accomplished on the cross.
35:23 I mean, sorry to be the wet blanket here, but isn't that the truth?
35:27 I mean, because really the people here on this earth can only hurt you so bad as to take
35:32 your life, right?
35:34 That's the worst thing that somebody could do to you or take the lives of those that
35:37 they that you love most.
35:39 But again, whether you're thinking of this as a, as a humanist point of view, secular
35:43 humanist type point of view, or if you think about this from a, you know, Christian Amago
35:46 Day point of view, you got to make sure that people can't hurt you.
35:51 You're going through actual persecution or just the persecution that you've made up in
35:54 your head.
35:55 All right, twelfth statement here.
35:58 If all men count with you, but none too much.
36:02 So as I read through that again, if all men count with you, but none too much, the way
36:08 that I take this and I've reserved full responsibility or the right to change my mind later, I've
36:15 kind of had to read through that line several times.
36:18 And again, if all men count with you, but none too much, the best I can come up with in
36:22 my, in my brain is that, that men, okay, I'm trying to think of the best way to describe
36:30 it.
36:31 But basically, people are important to you men are important to you, but there's not any
36:36 man around you that is so overwhelmingly important.
36:40 I know it took me like forever to just spit that out and some of you guys are like, okay,
36:44 Kyle, Kyle, come on, let's go.
36:45 We get it.
36:46 Again, men count men matter.
36:49 Like the people around you, they matter to you, but none of them matter overwhelmingly
36:52 too much.
36:53 Because I know a lot of people, including myself at different points, you put some people in
36:57 your life up on a pedestal and it kind of goes back to the last thing.
37:00 I mean, foes or loving friends being able to hurt you.
37:03 You put these people that you really, really like on this pedestal and then they just let
37:06 you down or they actively do something that doesn't have your best interest at heart.
37:12 I think it's good for us to understand that it is important for us to trust that we can
37:17 have men around us, especially like what I talk about all the time, foxhole guys, that
37:21 can matter to you.
37:24 But don't make them an idol either.
37:27 I mean, some of you guys out there, you've got, you've got deep friendships.
37:32 Maybe you grew up with a guy.
37:34 You both went to the same college.
37:35 You got into the same frat or you played on the same team and you know, you both got
37:39 married in near around the same time, you're the best man in each other's weddings and
37:43 you kind of got this crew of guys maybe from, from college or high school or work or something
37:47 like that or the military or the police academy and it's just like, that's like your crew.
37:52 And you should adore that crew and you should cultivate those relationships on a constant
37:56 basis.
37:57 But again, don't make them an idol because again, I talk about my Sunday night crew all
38:01 the time, that group of dudes that's like, that's, that's my group, right?
38:06 Like that, that is, I just wish I had found them earlier, right?
38:09 So that I could have deeper relationships with these guys, but you know, we're just
38:12 all wired the same, you know, we, we challenge each other like we just like that, right?
38:17 This is real iron, you know, this is real iron sharpening iron, like I just freaking
38:22 love it.
38:24 But those relationships shouldn't become overly important to the detriment of my number one
38:30 relationship on this earth, which is my relationship with my wife and my number one relationship
38:35 in the universe, which is my relationship with Jesus, right?
38:37 And again, there I go saying relationship.
38:40 I know I've talked about you shouldn't say it's a relationship with Jesus.
38:42 But again, I mean, that's the discipleship setup that I have with the Lord of the universe
38:48 and the Savior of us all.
38:49 That's a very, very important thing.
38:51 All right, guys, last if statement here.
38:54 If you can fill the unforgiving minute with 60 seconds worth of distance run, yours is
39:00 the earth and everything that's in it and which is more, you'll be a man, my son.
39:08 And so at this point, you have to take the totality of everything that we've talked about
39:12 up to this point and imagine being a young boy.
39:17 I'm thinking of, you know, a nine 10 year old, right?
39:20 You're hitting your girl spurts, you know, your body's changing, things inside your brain
39:24 are changing.
39:25 You're learning a lot of things.
39:26 You're getting stronger.
39:27 You're getting faster.
39:28 It's becoming more confusing around you by the day.
39:32 And I'm just imagining for the fathers out there with sons.
39:37 Can you imagine that if you, if you can read this poem or listen to this poem and understand
39:43 it yourself, what it would be like if you could pass on that same understanding to your
39:47 son, think of the impact and the overall power that would be able to be bestowed upon your
39:55 son by you.
39:57 I mean, this goes back to where, you know, I'm so, so much looking forward to the fact
40:02 that I may have a son someday, almost just so I can do rights of passage, just so I can
40:06 help usher this young boy to manhood.
40:10 And part of that is going to be by challenging him to read things like this and get stuff
40:15 out of it.
40:17 Because again, I just walked you through it line by line and I told you what I got out
40:21 of it, like there might be a commentary out there where Kipling basically explains line
40:27 by line what he thinks.
40:28 But as with most poetry, there's the intent of the writer, but then there's also the interpretation
40:33 of the reader.
40:35 They read it and they get something out of it that's different than the person that read
40:39 it right next to him.
40:41 And so I think this provides an ample opportunity for dads out there to put this in front of
40:45 their sons, not only so that they can read it and get the depth of understanding, but
40:50 let your son see you live these things out.
40:54 If you mess up on one of these if statements, be the first one to point it out to your son
40:58 and say, son, I fell short.
41:01 I fell short here.
41:03 I wasn't humble in that moment and I know I've been teaching you that you need to be
41:07 humble.
41:08 And I know that you've seen dad be humble in a lot of situations, but you just got to
41:11 know the way that I acted in that situation where you saw me, that was inappropriate.
41:17 Maybe even apologize to him.
41:18 I'm sorry, son.
41:20 And I also want you to see me pray to Jesus.
41:23 I want you to see me pray to God for forgiveness in this moment.
41:27 And I want you to see me ask for his, for, for his forgiveness.
41:30 I want you to see me repent, which means to turn away from my previous self and my previous
41:35 actions.
41:37 Just think about just the living benefit of something like that to where you have a walking
41:43 talking man in your life that is modeling these amazing things to you.
41:48 And again, I don't know if Rodeyard Kipling is a, is a Christian or was a Christian and
41:52 obviously passed away a long time ago, almost a hundred years ago.
41:55 But this is a guy that all soaked throughout this poem, you can pull out Christian truths.
42:02 Because again, God gave us logic.
42:04 God gave us the entire universe.
42:07 And you can take all that and dial it in and be able to put it into a poem like this that
42:13 you can chew on and let other people in your life that are important to you chew on.
42:17 It's a pretty amazing thing.
42:18 All right, guys, we're going to do a quick resilience boost before we let you get out
42:21 of here.
42:22 As you know, by now, we are a men's ministry and our mission is cultivating manly resilience.
42:26 Specifically, we do that by providing content like this podcast that forges spiritual, mental
42:31 and physical toughness.
42:32 So for you today, I've got the Wikipedia page for Rodeyard Kipling.
42:36 So you can kind of read up on his life, dude, had a very, very interesting life.
42:39 I've got a copy of the jungle book.
42:40 I haven't read it yet.
42:41 So it's kind of getting me excited, potentially digging that and then I've got the YouTube
42:44 video of Dennis Hopper on the Johnny Cash show reading the if poem.
42:49 So that's the audio that we had for you earlier, but I want you to see it visually if you'd
42:52 like to dig into that as well.
42:54 All right, guys.
42:55 Thanks so much for listening to the podcast.
42:56 We really do appreciate it.
42:58 If you would, please subscribe on iTunes, SoundCloud or Google Play and refer your friends to listen
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43:17 forget to leave a few comments as well.
43:19 I'm currently booking speaking engagements for the remainder of 2019 and 2020.
43:23 So if you want me to come speak on your podcast, to your men's event, at your conference,
43:28 whatever, just hit me up info at undaunted.life.
43:31 That's I N F O at undaunted.life.
43:33 The website is www dot undaunted.life.
43:36 You can follow us on Instagram and Twitter at undaunted life or Facebook.com backslash
43:40 undaunted life.
43:41 Check out our free devotionals on the U version Bible app.
43:44 Just search undaunted life under plans and as always, we want to thank the band August
43:47 Burns read for allowing us to use their entire music library for our content.
43:52 The intro outro track on this podcast is our song King of Sorrow, which is off their latest
43:55 record entitled Phantom Anthem.
43:57 The links are in the description.
43:59 I'm your host, Kyle Thompson.
44:01 Remember, keep cultivating manly resilience, keep forging spiritual, mental and physical
44:07 toughness.
44:08 Keep seeking the Lion of Judah.
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Kyle Thompson
This entire poem builds up to that last sentence, and in that last sentence, he kind of actually botched it... 'And which is more, you'll be a man, my son.'
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